


Joker

by orphan_account



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-24
Updated: 2018-01-04
Packaged: 2019-01-04 19:30:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 34,774
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12175203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: [ch18 up] [Now on hiatus/undergoing revision]There are many reasons you want to become a hunter. You want the ability to judge those who hurt others, you want to create a world for yourself to pursue what you want, and most importantly, you want to chase the jester who painted your world in colour.7 years after you decided your own path, you attend the 287th hunter exam, where you bump into some familiar faces.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, I haven't written fanfiction for a few years, and i just felt like writing since i recently rewatched HxH bc of the manga hiatus and became completely obsessed again. hahah. '-';; so yeah, sorry if my writing and all is rusty. 
> 
>  
> 
> I tried to use the suit emojis as accurately as possible, but I'm not sure if theyre the most suitable to the emotion he feels oops. 
> 
> Enjoy!

A strange mixture of fear and anger mingle as they course through your body. Your arms tremble and your fingers tighten against the rigid plastic handle of the butchers knife. You stare at the largest assailant, trying to act as devoid of emotion as possible. Your heartbeat was speeding away, but you don't let that show on your face. You move your right foot backwards so that your feet are shoulder width apart, side on to the thieves who had intruded your home. You try to make the atmosphere around you as intimidating as possible.

"Leave." Your voice is harsh despite your fear. The command only prompt the intruders to laugh.

"Taking orders from a child?" One guffaws "I don't think you realise who's in charge here, girly" Another one remarks, snidely.

Your eyes narrow, and anger engulfs you. How dare these people just barge into your home, and laugh at you as you try to defend it. From behind you your mother tugs on your shirt, shaking her head as if telling you to just let them raid the house, as if that is the safest alternative. You shake off the idea, and grab another knife from the counter and charge towards the biggest man.

"(Y/N)! NO!" You hear your mother protest.

Perhaps it is the adrenaline coursing through your veins which dictates your movements and multiplies your strength. You feint an attack to the man's abdomen and duck behind him as he attempts to block the feint. As you move past him, you slash his left arm. His right hand darts to his wound, covering the bloody laceration. At the same instant, the two others move to restrain you. Both of your arms are restrained, and you can see their eyes glint.

"Don't get cocky girly. You're only a child." One snickers, bending your arm into an unnatural position.

You hiss at the pain that shot up your right arm, dropping the knife you had previously wielded. The larger man was towering over you now and you could see the rage in his eyes.

"Now why don't you go to sleep for us?"

You feel a cloth being held over your face but struggle against the grip of your assailants. For a moment you feel them freeze, and one of them lets you go. When you look up, you see your mother had thrown a frying pan at the man, and landed a direct hit. Your little sister clung onto her leg, wailing. For a second you cheer on her behalf, sending a smile at her and twist your other hand out of the other mans grip. Briefly you acknowledge the fact that you may have to kill these men. For a second you doubt yourself, feeling the bile rise up to your throat at the thought of murdering at the age of 10. Taking life was against your moral code, no matter who they were. _What if you became desensitised to the act? What would it make you if you killed a man at 10?_ You question yourself. It only takes one glance at your family's trembling figure to brace yourself again. You swing at the neck of the largest man. Before the blade can make contact with his skin, you see that all 3 men had fallen around you. 

"What?" You wonder out loud, surveying your surroundings. 

"A little girl like you shouldn't be forced to kill unwillingly ♠" The voice was no more than a silky purr, much to close for your liking. 

As you spun around, you were face to face with boy, probably almost double your height. His hair was a fiery red, tousled to no side in particular. He wore loose white attire, that seemed to mimic a jesters outfit. The sleeves were cuffed halfway down his upper arm, revealing his well toned muscles. The corners of his lips tilted in a way to hint at his displeasure. You frown, not particularly processing the fact that had killed the men that attacked your home. 

"Neither should you. Don't butt into other peoples business without knowing a thing." You shoot back. 

It hadn't occurred to you that your body was itching with dissatisfaction at the outcome. Your instincts probably wanted to end the lives of your own attacks with your own hands. You were pointing, and your annoyance was probably plain to see. 

"Ohh? I thought I was doing you a favour. You should be more thankful. ♣"

"No." You refuse simply.

Your eyes narrow, as if exiling him from your house. From behind you, your mother stands up, approaching the two of you, your little sister still clinging on to her legs. 

"Thank you. On behalf of (Y/N) as well." She gushes

You can hear the confusion and fear still tense in her voice, so you sigh, diverting your gaze to the ground. 

"Thanks." you add, surrendering your own pride. 

"(Y/N), huh?" The boy tests, "(Y/N), (Y/N), (Y/N)... ♥" 

You blink, looking up- your name sounded so good when he said it, and before you could register your own emotions, a tinge of pink spread to your cheeks. Of course, it went neither ignored or unrecognised by you, who had yet to extinguish your newfound grudge.

~

That was the first time you had met Hisoka, and you still vividly recall the emotions you felt for him from that day on wards.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Basically this is the "present" where the story is set '-';; I'm thinking of having small, i guess, scenes from the past when it seems like it fits, maybe some in the readers dreams and flashbacks and others just like a full on chapter every 3-4 chapters.  
> Tbh i still havent decided how to compose the story yet hahah llOTL, just kinda going with the flow of my imagination and hoping it turns out alright.  
> Also I'm going to try to have the reader stay as far from Gon as possible while still being his close friend, since I don't want to just retell the events in the manga/anime.

Your eyes are shut tight. Your hair billows in the wind. Your lungs sting pleasantly as you inhale the briny scent of the ocean. After spending the last 5 years travelling from home to various other continents, the ocean felt like such a natural place to be. You feel the presence of the ships captain behind you, and you turn to greet him. You had always chuckled at his typical appearance, a scruffy beard, a sailors hat and some missing teeth, exactly like a pirate.

"Hey, Capt'" You greet, nodding in his direction.

"(Y/N)! Nice to see you finally taking the Hunter exam" He jokes, leaning against a wooden beam in front of you. 

"Glad to be finally taking it."

You had gotten to know the captain of this ship quite well during your regular travels, in fact, you probably knew everything about each other. Not to mention the fact that he was completely in love with your mother, and spoiled your little sister every time you brought her with you on your travels. He knew you wanted to become a hunter for an extremely long time, however, every time you got to Dolle Harbour, you would feel as if something was missing, and immediately re-board the ship. Every year he would joke about you finally taking the test, and every year you've backed out at the last second. Of course this also meant you were accustomed to the storm he sailed through to test the applicants. You had developed an enjoyment of staying on the front deck, enjoying the sensation of wind and water surging over your skin.

"So, (Y/N), see any promising applicants?" 

"That blond seems like she could become a hunter within a few years."

You subtly motion in the direction of a girl clad in white cotton training clothes with a blue tabard over the top.  As if on queue, her eyes dart to your direction from behind the book she was reading. You wave in response and grin at her. 

"Hmm, I'd have to agree with you on that one." 

"Shit, anyone would." You tease, earning a roll of his eyes at your typical playful behaviour. 

After a pause, he begins to walk back to the cabin until you stop him.

"How many more stops 'til the harbour?" 

"Just Whale Island left" 

You nod in acknowledgement and he continues to walk away. You are delighted at the memory of Whale island. When you had visited to study some local species, the people who lived there were all so nice, warning you about their various territorial behaviours, especially when raising their young. Some families even invited you to eat with them, and took it upon themselves to tour you around the area. The memory made your heart warm and brought a genuine smile to your face. The world needed more people like them. Lost in your thoughts, you had fallen asleep in no time. 

"Ah! It's (Y/N)!" 

A familiar, chirpy voice makes you groan and turn away from the direction it was coming from. Waking up had always been one of your least favourite activities, ever. The rude awakening also brings attention to the ache in your back and butt from it's extensive contact with the hard deck of the ship. Once again, you groan in discomfort. You prop yourself up with a grouchy pout, trying to no avail to rub the sleep from your eyes as you knew full well that you wouldn't be able to go back to sleep. Your attention turns back to the source of the voice, with the full intention to curse the living daylights out of them.

"Listen here you little-" You're cut as you recognise the boy's spiky black hair, and shining brown eyes. "Gon!"

"(Y/N)! I see you're still not a morning person." He laughs heartily,

"That makes 4 times now. You owe me big time. No one's allowed to disrupt my sleep like that." 

"Hey! I made it up to you with tasty fish."

You sigh, knowing he was telling the truth, "Fine. I'll let this one slide. Anyway, I see you caught the master of the swamp?" 

"Yup! I was waiting so patiently and went at the exact time of the day you told me to go! I hid in leaves and when it took the bait i was like wooosh! and ran around the tree and used my body weight to pull it up!" 

"I'm proud of you, my child" You laugh at his story, patting his gravity defying hair.

"Hey! You're not even that much older than me!"

"Dude, I could probably fu-" You cut yourself off with a cough before you could make a joke too inappropriate for his age, "I'm like 18, I'm probably closer in age to your dad than you."

You see him counting numbers on his fingers, frowning in concentration. 

"That's not right. That would mean I was born when he was..... 7!" 

You couldn't help but burst out laughing at his lack of mathematical ability. For the next few hours the two of you continued to chat about the adventures both of you had been on in the year that had passed since you last visited his island.

 

~

 

"There's a storm coming."

His statement was sudden in cutting of your previous conversation. He clears his nose and raises his face to sniff the air. You decide that you'd let the captain have his fun testing Gon, after all you were sure he would easily pass. 

"Oh?" 

"I'm gonna go warn the captain."

As he leaves, you move to your usual position at the front deck, as close to bowspirit as possible. You smile while gripping to the wooden structure at the front of the boat. Your eyes flutter shut and you bite your lip, inhaling the invigorating scent of the storm. The ship begins to rock under you, and you feel a few stray droplets of water land against your skin. The building wind seemed to caress at your skin. Every sensation integrates together, building a tactility that makes you feel completely free. It wasn't long before both the wind grew in strength, and the water that had once only tickled against your skin threatens to engulf you with every wave that washes over you. The sensation was so natural, as if the water and the wind was a part of you. You feel a pleasant rush in your chest with every movement the boat made, falling, rising and falling again. It was such an invigorating experience.

 

~

 

It was hard to tell how much time had passed since the storm started, but the seas had calmed enough to gently rock the ship along. You scowl, manoeuvring yourself up from your seated position to find a towel, and perhaps a change of clothes. Somewhere along the way, the pleasant bite of the cold had manifested into an extremely uncomfortable freezing sensation that made your limbs numb. As soon as the storm had calmed, you realised how unpleasantly your clothes stuck to your body and frowned. You always seemed to regret the consequences of such decisions, and you hated to admit it, but your impulsiveness may be the reason you end up dead some day. With a sigh, you begin to drag your body to the cabin. 

"Every year you make a mess of these floors." You hear the scratchy sigh of the captain from somewhere in front of you and follow the voice. 

"Mmm, too good of an opportunity to let pass." Your reasoning is halfhearted, with a yawn. 

"You were right, that blond has potential."

"Of course, of course"

You feel a ball of fabric hit you, and immediately move to catch it. A towel along with a familiar shirt and pair of shorts. 

"Thank god you always leave your clothes lying around when you travel." His grouchy tone hid a hint of amusement at your messy tendencies. 

You flash him a grateful smile and move to the area you always used to sleep. As soon as your body makes contact with the soft pillows, you fall asleep. 


	3. Chapter 3

You are staring intently at a map along with Gon, Kurapika and Leorio. Promptly, you locate Zaban city, analysing all routes to the location of the exam. Throwing a quick look to the road to your right, where busses which were supposedly departing for Zaban city were parked, you note that the last departed bus took the wrong path in a visible fork in the road, and quickly ruled the fact as suspicious. You glance at your new friends, Leorio and Kurapika, the latter of which you had quickly discovered was in fact a male with comical shock. You were glad people like them existed to help society in this era of crime and poverty.

“Leorio, can I borrow your knife?”

“Huh? For what?”

You point to the long sleeves of your shirt- thick and uncomfortable tight, restricting the movement of your shoulder and elbow joints. Leorio sighs, and throws his pocket knife at you. After cutting off the sleeves, you smile, tying the fabric around your wrist and handing the knife back with a smile.

“Thanks”

He blushes, and looks away as your fingers make contact.

“In any case, I’m going this way”

You point towards the road to your right.

“Ehh? But the captain said to go that way!”

You shake your head with a chuckle and reach your hands to the sky.

“If I do this, I’m going to do it on my own. I feel like that’s the proper way to chase my dreams, since it’s how I’ve been doing it for the last few years. Anyway, you guys better make it, I’ll see you there.”

With that, and a wave, you start jogging towards the road leading to Zaban city, with the image of the map in your head.

~

The jog to Zaban city wasn’t too long, a few kilometres at most, and within half an hour you were there. Of course, it was attributed to the fact that you didn’t get lost on the way, since the route there only consisted of 3 forks.

“Hmm.. Now that I’m here….” You muse to yourself, scanning your surroundings. “What should I do next?”

You decide to keep an eye on your surroundings, find a pattern in the personalities of the people who enter and exit each building. You calculated that you should find the exact site within 30 minutes, and confirm it within an hour. In the meantime, you could go shopping. No matter how hard you had trained within the last 5 years, you still had some girly tendencies at heart.

~

After 40 minutes of browsing shopping stands, and stalls along the few streets in the city, you had both your arms full of bags, in front of a ramen restaurant. You were slightly surprised by the choice of the exam site, but you had seen over 20 people walk in. Currently only 3 customers sat inside the restaurant. Even more strange was the choice of clothing worn by those people, most carrying weapons and a few of them stuck out so obviously as odd balls in society. On multiple occasions, you had seen them go into a room in the back, yet when the door opened again, the room was empty, with seemingly no other exits. It had to be this restaurant. Carefully, you push open the door to the restaurant. You are instantly greeted by a waiter.

“Welcome! A table for one?”

“Uhm, actually, I need to get into that back room.”

The waiter looks slightly wary, and studies you from head to toe. Of course, you didn’t look like you were an applicant, denim shorts and a slightly torn t-shirt, with 5 or 6 shopping bags on your arms. For a second, you second guess your decision to be so forward.

“What are you here for?”

You sigh, deciding that since you already pulled yourself down this route, it’d be better for you to stay on it.

“The hunter exam. It’s here, right?”

The waiter exchanges a glance with a chef, and sigh. The worker silently beckons you for follow him. He leads you into the room you had observed.

“This elevator will take you to the exam. Good luck.” He tells you, before leaving the room.

As the door closes, the room starts to decent, leaving you wondering how the exam will phase out. You had heard stories online about previous exams, and they had all horrified you. The images of such events running through your mind had prevented you from stepping foot on the continent where the test was held every year. When you made your way here, you had thought those nerves disappeared, but now you realise that they had just made themselves known late. Way too late for you to do anything about them. It was the furthest you had gotten, and you weren’t about to stop.

The loud ding of the elevator cut through your trembling arms, and the doors part. In front of you were over a hundred people. The serious aura filling the darkened hall was intimidating, and you initially take a step back before proceeding to step out of the elevator. You are greeted by a little green creature, with a head resembling a bean. He hands you a circular plate, with a dubious expression.

“Number 304. This way please.”

You accept the plate and he directs you to keep walking. You keep your surroundings in your periphery, but continue to act as harmless as you could. You recognised some of the people who you had witness enter the restaurant before you, and silently thank them. It took only a minute of 2 to find an unoccupied corner, where you take your seat. The plastic straps on your shopping bags had dug into your skin and become uncomfortable, so you pull your arms out from the constraints. You begin to dig through the bags, satisfied with the items you bought. As you open your 4th bag, a shadow covers your light source and interrupts your fun. You grow slightly irritated, and look up to see a short round man clad in blue. Something about his square nose made you want to punch him, and it was probably obvious by your expression.

“Hey, hey, don’t be like that,” He begins, holding his hands out in front of him as if to make peace with you. “I just came to introduce myself and bond over a drink.”

You stare at him, and his hand which was now extended with a can of what looked like juice.

“I’m Tonpa.” He introduces, as he realises you were going to stay silent. “I’m a veteran at taking this exam, so feel free to ask me if you have any questions.”

You relax slightly at his offer of information, and reach out to take the drink. In acceptance of his presence, you offer your name with a nonchalant voice in hopes that he would take the hint and leave you alone.

“Anyway, that man over there is Bourbon, the snake charmer. I heard that if you attack him, his snakes will attack you, and over there, Amori, Imori and Umori. Their teamwork is something else entirely, and are unstoppable once they get into formation.”

You spare a few glances towards the participants he addresses, a hum slightly. You take note of him cracking open his own can of juice, and taking a swig.

“Ahh, it’s so sweet! You should try some of yours!” He encourages.

“Sure, I guess.” You respond with a shrug.

You stare at the can in your hand, popping open the cap warily. As soon as you bring the can to your lips, you hear a hushed whisper close-by.

“That Tonpa, always pretending to be sweet, when he really wants to see that poor girl fail.”

“It’s such a shame, she’s such a pretty catch, but she’ll be shitting her pants soon.”

“Too bad, a pretty lady like her should just stay away from dangerous situations like the hunter exam.”

In an instant the irritation you felt from before multiplies tenfold. How dare this asshole just barge into your space and try to poison you. Before the liquid can touch your lips, your line of site snaps directly to him, and he can probably see the irritation in your eyes. Within seconds, the upper frame of his body is drenched in juice.

“Go poison someone else, asshole.”

You crumple the can and throw it right into his face. People had turned their attention to the two of you now. Your stare continues to bare directly into his eyes as he backs away, and eventually turns his back to you. With a sigh, you sit back down, and resume your previous activities. There were 330 examinees now, but Gon, Leorio and Kurapika had not yet arrived. It seemed like they took the long way.

Unbeknownst to you, a pair of golden eyes were fixed on your figure, the owner runs his tongue over his lips as if in anticipation.

“Oh? What a coincidence. ♦”

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This feels like such a filler chapter, but i had fun writing it. I feel like it was kinda unnecessary tbh but i really wanted to extend upon the relationship between the reader and Hisoka and i guess, draw it out the way i intend for it to be seen ??. '-';  
> apologies for skipping a big intro scene with hisoka but i felt like if they met under those circumstances, it would have made a bigger scene than i would have liked it too.  
> On a side note, i really hope the tense was a consistent past tense for the flash back and a consistent present tense for everything else. I also stopped using suit symbols on all of Hisoka's dialogue bc it felt a bit over the top, and i tried to keep them to places which portrayed more emotion and all. eep

An hour or two passes before the doors open a final time. Three figures exit the elevator, and they are greeted by the green bean man. You were zoned out in your own world while waiting for your friends to arrive. Unfortunately, your lack of attention disables you from protecting your friends from the rookie crusher. In fact, you were so lost in your own world, that you even missed Hisoka’s performance of turning a man’s arm into tiny flower petals. Perhaps he timed it that way since he knew you so well. Was it ironic that you were thinking of him?

~

That one day with him 7 years ago was probably the most fun you ever had. It was the first day that you felt like you were truly free.

“Yo, (Y/N). ♥ “ Hisoka’s voice sang from behind you.

You span around to face him, but didn’t find him anywhere.

“Wanna see a magic trick? I’m quite proud of this one.” The same voice teased, again from behind.

You pouted, and moved to grab at the direction of the voice, only to grip nothing but air.

“What an eager girl you are. ”

You manoeuvred your body around, but aimed your kick at the space you had been facing previously. He grabbed your ankle to stop your kick, but you smiled at him triumphantly.

“What a shame, I was still preparing the trick.”

“Too bad.” You spoke victoriously all the while trying to wriggle your leg free.

“Hmm? Is it really? “

When he let go of your ankle, you moved to grab him, but a rain of playing cards blocked your view. He had disappeared yet again. You puffed your cheeks out in frustration.

“Hisoka! Come out or I’m leaving.”

Your threat was met with silence. In return, you began to stomp towards the exit of the park in child-like frustration. With your glare trained on the floor, it was easy to miss the tall figure blocking the entrance, subsequently bumping into it. The said figure pulled you into a hug and span you around easily.

“Come on, appreciate my magic tricks a bit more, (Y/N). ♠”

You couldn’t help but giggle at the slightly dejected tone that tinged his usual sly speech. You used this to turn the situation in your favour.

“I was just acting. You came out. I win!”

You wrapped your arms around his abdomen, and held him in a vice like grip with a victorious grin.

“My, do you play dirty. I’ll have to keep in mind your talents for the next time we meet. ♦”

Thinking back to that day, you were surprised at the astonishing nature of the transpired events. They were things you knew shouldn’t be possible, a levitating dress in the window of a shop, a set of shoes with wheels on the heel rolling their way to you on their own, and the signs on the street which all changed to address you at the touch of his hand. Yet they happened. When you had asked Hisoka about them, he attributed them to magic, and because of that, you still believe in the very concept to this day. If you had one word to describe those hours that you spent with him, it would be just that, magical.

A particularly flustering conversation you had with him took place in front of a rustic fountain. The two of you were seated on the brick surrounding the monument, chattering with ice cream in hand.

“(Y/N), why’d you choose to get bubble gum ice cream?”

“Why?” You hummed, cupping your hand around your chin, as if thinking intently. “Hmm… I’d say that it’s because of you.”

“Me?” Hisoka questioned, pointing to himself.

“Yeah, I want to know what Hisoka tastes like.” You paused to lick up a drop that had melted onto your hand. “You remind me of bubble gum.”

“What I taste like?” He echoed, lips twisting into a playful smirk.

The memory made you blush, not realising the perverse implications of your words.

“Mhm!” You agreed

“Bungee gum.” He stated, “The name of my favourite candy as a child. My family was poor so we frequently went nights without food. I used to chew the gum until it lost its flavour.”

You stared at him. As he made eye contact, he expected there to be pity in your eyes, or some kind of sorrow, yet they shone with excitement.

“Hisoka. Tell me more about your past.” You demanded with a soft grip on his wrist.

“Mmm, I shouldn’t have divulged you in such secrets. ♠”

To your surprise, he proceeded to lean over you to steal a bite from your melting ice cream. You quickly snatched your cone away, and batted at his intruding body.

“Hey!” You complained, proceeding to whine about how you liked the flavour and wanted it all to yourself.

“Sorry, sorry, I couldn’t help myself.”

A momentary silence followed your banter. Seconds passed before you decided to speak again.

“Hey, Hisoka?” Your tone was somber and a warm pink stained your cheeks.

From your disposition, he guessed that you were going to do something along the lines of confessing to him. With that thought in mind, your next words did well to shock him. He should have probably been accustomed to your strange decisions, but they were just so illogical. It was the most entertainment he’d crossed in months.

“Are you gay?”

You looked him in the eye, with a completely stoic expression. You could practically hear the sound of crows in the background, and his previously prepared answer vanished from his mind.

“And what makes you think that?” He wonders, eyes narrowing in both genuine curiosity and displeasure.

“Well, this was the first time you spoke about your past, but when you do speak about yourself at all, it’s always-“ You take an intake of breath, trying your best to imitate his voice, which he held higher than it’s baritone nature. “’-He excites me so much’ or ‘His expression turns me on’ or ‘He’s so good, with that spirit of his’”

Now that you had phrased it that way, he did see the logic behind your comical assumptions. He nodded to express his understanding of your point, but you continued.

“It’s always about a man, how you want to break them.“

“(Y/N) ♠” He tried to interrupt, but you kept vocalising your observations.

“And not to mention, you have this really weird aura around you every time you speak of them. It’s creepy, like you’re obsessed with them or something.“

You are cut off by his hand on your shoulder. The atmosphere around him enough to make you shudder, wanting to immediately keel over and hide. It was the same emanation that he exuded every time he talked about the people he wanted to fight, but this time, it was directed solely at you. You could feel water pooling in the corners of your eyes, but as soon as the intense atmosphere set it, it had disappeared.

“A good reaction.” He stated.

It was a typical reaction. The same reaction anyone else would give. It gave him satisfaction, that he could bring such a normal response out of you, yet he felt as if something was missing. That something was addressed seconds later, as he began to turn away from you. Your voice was loud and clear as you clutch the back of his shirt.

“Hisoka. I like you.”

Your voice was firm, but you couldn’t bring yourself to look him in the eye just yet. You were still shaken from the bloodlust you felt just moments ago, but your feelings were plain to you. Once again, your actions surprised him. When you finally raised your head to return his stare, he could see the resolve in your eyes.

“My, what a wonderful expression you’re wearing right now. ♥”

When the sun set hours later, the two of you were perched atop a tree which was hundreds of feet tall. At first you were terrified, clinging to him in case you fell from the thick branch, but as time went on and the tree proved its own stability, you relaxed. The tree overlooked a beautiful shore, where the water reflected all the beautiful hues of pink and orange that blended together in the sunset. You hadn’t noticed at the time, but entranced by that enthralling view, your aspirations began to click together.

“Hey, Hisoka?” Your voice is peaceful.

“Hmm?”

His regard is completely focused on you. He is studying your expression, your posture. Most importantly, he was focused on how weak he thought you were. Despite all that, his heart quickened in pace when you addressed him in such an appreciative way. In the end, he could pretend to be confused all he wanted, but of course he knew the reason for his excitement. The real problem was whether he accepted it or not.

“Thanks.” You whisper

“…♠”

Of course, he had to accept it, he knew it was unrealistic to think any other way.  

~

“I’m the same age as you were when we first met… And yet, I’m nowhere near caught up to you.” You muse, to no one in particular, huddling your knees closer to your chest.

Eventually, Gon, Kurapika and Leorio spotted you amongst the rest of the examinees, and approached you.

“(Y/N)!”

The voice snaps you out of your daydreams and you turn your attention in their direction, and your eyes light up.

“Huh? Were you crying?”

Kurapika’s inquisition made you bring a tentative hand to the corners of your eyes, which sure enough, were wet.

“Ahh, my tear ducts are blocked.” You dismiss quickly.

The four of you continue to chatter for a few minutes before a loud alarm rings through the hall. It was time for the first phase of the exam to begin.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In which I forgot frogs have stomachs and treat them as an entity. whoopsies. 
> 
> I wish I could just insert dramatic music into writing. It would be so perfect for one of the scenes in this chapter. But alas, I cannot. T-T

As soon as you figure out the nature of the first phase, you begin to develop mixed feelings about your previous purchases. From the stature of other examinees, you conclude that it would take at least 50 kilometres before they recognised any potential worth in the examinees. The examiner, who’s hair reminded you of a bundle of purple bananas, had already began a moderately paced walk down a dark tunnel. You look between your shopping bags, and his shrinking figure with a sigh. You scan the site for the green bean that greeted you, he would probably be the most reliable person to have mind your inventory. Thinking over your purchases, you pull out a back pack, a well-made dagger, and a pair of wheels that attached to the back of sneakers. With those items in your hands, you dart over to leave the white plastic bags in front of the bean.

“Mind these for me, okay?” You grin to the figure before running off before he could protest.

The said green man lets out an exasperated sigh. You kick on the wheels, knowing that you didn’t have the stamina to run the expected distance for a hunter so you let the accessory carry you past the other applicants, catching back up with your friends. As you approach their figures, you notice another boy who is riding a skateboard alongside Gon. You were starting to ignore your surroundings, deeming the other contestants to not be a threat in the current stage.

“Oh, welcome back, (Y/N)!”

Both boys turn to look back at you, and you wave in response.

“Hey, Gon!”

Gon wastes no time introducing you to his new-found friend.

“(Y/N), this is Killua, he’s the same age as me, isn’t that cool?”

You let out a chuckle, and nod.

“Killua, this is (Y/N), I’ve known her for 3 years and she’s amazing!”

The white-haired boy, Killua, eyes you, but his demeaner quickly changes from one of suspicion to acceptance. You had tried to act cool, reaching out a hand to shake his, all the while stopping the wheels attached to your heel, so that you could pace into a jog, however instead of showing off how cool you were, you had tripped over your own feet, and stumbled a couple of meters with a loud thud. This causes Killua to burst into laughter, hopping off his own skateboard to further enjoy your clumsy spectacle. Gon had also halted to a stop, trying to supress his laughter while he looks back to you.

“Hey! Don’t laugh at me!” You whine

You stumble to pick yourself up, but the clunky addition to your heel causes you to slip back on your butt. This only furthers the laughter of the two boys.

~

Around 70 or 80 kilometres had passed, the examiner who introduced himself as Satotz begins to decent up a flight of stairs. At the vision of the seemingly never-ending ascent, you sigh and kick off the wheels attached to your shoes. The multiple flights of stairs the group climbed wasn’t anything that challenged you, of course since you had played your way out of the previous marathon. You kept at the front, and ended up arriving at the grassy fields right after Gon and Killua.

“Yay! I won!” Gon celebrates as he crosses into the field

“Huh? No, obviously I did!” Killua interjects

“No way! I got here first!”

“Who won?” The two turn to you.

“It was a tie” You state definitively, which only causes their gaze to bear further into you.

“Then you treat us to a meal.” They decide in synchronisation.

You can only sigh, not bothering to reject their forceful request.

“Okay, okay, whatever.”

Shortly after the dispute, all the applicants had gather around Satotz on the field. The tension in the air is thick, and most of the people there were eyeing the other applicants to process the skills of everyone else who had made it through the marathon. It seems that around 40 applicants had dropped out in the first stage. When you acknowledge the size of the crowd that had formed, you were surprised at the large amount of people who had the stamina to run 80 kilometres. You hear the grinding of gears, and turn to see the shutters to the previous area close. A man is crawling up the stairs, with outstretched fingers.

“W-wait! Wait for me!” He pants, to no avail.

The loud thud of the doors closing had you turn back to face Satotz, awaiting the next instructions. His next words were warnings about the deceptive nature of the swamp, which had some applicants whining.

“How are we going to be fooled if we are expecting it?” Leorio gloats.

“Don’t let him fool you!” The raised voice of a man comes from the corner of the building which contained the track you previously ran.

“Like. I. Said. How are we going to be fooled if we’re expecting it?” Leorio retorts, but does a double-take when he sees the man.

A man, seemingly in his 20s or 30s stood pointing at Satotz, with a monkey in tow. The creature was battered, and had what seemed like a mask resembling the examiner replacing its face.

“This is a man-faced ape. They take on the appearance of a human to lure unsuspecting humans into the fogs where they attack and devour their prey.”

You stare at the monkey, then at Satotz then back again. Sure, there was a resemblance, but the ambience surrounding the man who had previously called himself examiner felt a lot more human. You immediately dismissed the claims, and expected those around you to do likewise. Immediately, there is a wildfire of chatter. People were falling for the man’s words.

“I’m your real examiner, but was attacked by that monkey.” The man declares.

His declaration only makes the accusation less realistic, a hunter being defeated by an animal? The story was impossible to you, and you were hoping the other participants would see such an obvious contradiction. Again, they underwhelmed your expectations by being even more suspicious of Satotz. You decide to raise your voice to explain why the proposition was impossible, but as you step forward, 3 cards fly past your face. You follow the projectiles and freeze at the sight before you. The vision of 3 cards protruding from the applicants head made your head spin. The scene was both grotesque and nostalgic, and images of the first time you had met Hisoka flash before your eyes.

“I see, I see. ♦”

The voice made you shiver, the familiarity made your knees weak. You couldn’t will your frozen body to turn around to look at him. You were completely sure it was Hisoka.

“That settles it then. ♣”

He feels a sense of achievement. You were still accustomed to the way he accentuated his words. The lilted rhythm of his voice which perfectly matches his personality. The sly tones that had captivated you, no doubt with a coy smile that sparked immeasurable excitement in your chest. A part of you wanted to smile at the memories that washed through your brain.

“He is the real examiner ♦”

He is excited. You are reminded of the way he made his sentiments so clear from the way he spoke. Your hand darts over your mouth to keep yourself from yelling after him. The details of your surroundings as you falter deep into your own thoughts. _How did I not notice him earlier?_ Satotz is setting a ground rule. _Did he notice me?_ Hisoka agrees to abide. _No, he definitely noticed._ Crows flock the fresh corpse. _How many years has it been?_ The crowd murmur to each other. _Hisoka._

“(Y/N)!” You are broken out of your thoughts by Gon shaking your shoulder wearing a concerned expression.

You can barely will your body to move, but you manage a nod and a weak smile.

“I’m fine.”

Behind Gon, Kurapika and Killua seem indifferent while Leorio expresses his agreement with your reaction. They had seemed to assume you were in extreme shock at the gruesome death. At this point, any other assumption would be illogical. As soon as you can muster the courage, you shoot a glance at the space where Hisoka was previously standing. Of course he would have been gone. You can only chuckle at the feeling that rises in your chest. Excitement, love and achievement.

“Hisoka.”

~

Satotz motions for all the applicants to follow closely as he begins his abnormal motions into the fog. You accelerate into a jog behind Gon and Killua.

“I think it’d be the best for us to move forward.” Killua suggests.

You definitely agreed with that sentiment, but a part of you wanted to find Hisoka. You slow your pace.

“You guys go ahead.” You state, waving them forward.

Killua looks to you dubiously when your pace almost halves. As the fog thickens, you briefly wonder if you made the right decision. You can barely see the shadows in front of you at this point, and footsteps in the wetland were quick to fade. You notice the ground in front of you shifting, and quickly avoid the patch that had moved. As you jog past the suspicious loop, a huge frog emerges from the earth, swallowing the patch of dirt it lay under. The impact also worked to push you into a thorny bush. A brief tide of relief washes over you only to be replaced by terror as you see a huge spider nesting above you, consuming the carcass of what you hoped was just a man-faced ape. You feel something shift in the bush you fell atop, and quickly move away from the shrubbery. It soon dawns on you that it was a mistake on your part when you feel your face bump into something slimy. The sensation moves down your cheek and extends to your chest, then to your tummy, then down your thighs before it pulls you forward. The acceleration causes you to squeak and close your eyes on instinct. When your eyes are open again, you are surrounded by darkness.

“Hello?” You test.

The only response is your own echo. Of course, that wouldn’t work- you conclude that the only logical explanation was some sort of frog like creature having consumed you. You sigh and sit down on the viscous liquids which coats the insides of the frog, thinking of a plan. Experimentally, you poke one wall of the creature that had trapped you. You feel the muscles under you contract slightly. You move again, but this time you punch it. The entire vessel shifts to the right with great force.

“Ah.” You grin

You hoped that it was an involuntary reaction by the muscle as opposed to its conscious reaction to your punch. That would allow you to control its movements a lot better. Somewhere along your life, you had learnt that stimulating a frog’s spinal cord could make it jump. The dagger you had packed would come in useful, and you were extremely grateful. Your eyes had finally adjusted to the dark, and you locate what looked like the circular muscle connected to the eye socket of the frog. It is close enough to reach from the inside, but you knew you had to control the creature before it went insane from the pain of having its eye gouged out. You tentatively touch a finger to the muscle around the spinal cord, pleased to see it had no reaction to the stimulus. You position both hands under the eye.

“Here goes nothing.” You breath

You slash a hole around the eye of the frog as fast as you can, while pulling yourself upwards. As soon as your dominant hand was through the hole, you push off the ground, and land a kick against its spinal cord with as much force as you can muster. You feel everything accelerating upwards, and pull your upper body through the hole you created. Your plan was a success. From above the canopy of the wetlands, you could see everything. A quick scan of the area allows you to locate a gate- it reminded you of structures from medieval paintings. You could see figures gathering around one portion of the tall construction, and conclude your destination. Using the momentum of your own body, you force the frog to face the direction in question. As you descend, you prepare another, stronger kick to the protruding bone that formed a line down the centre of the creature’s insides. The sharpest edge of your shoe digs into the creature’s flesh as soon as you feel the ground under you again. To your excitement, it looked like the kick had caused the frog to jump further than it previously had, meaning your approximate landing position would be-

“Shit.”

-You would land against the stone wall. You pull yourself back into the safety of the frog, hoping that the wetland friend you had forcefully made was either dead or unconscious so you wouldn’t have to suffer the embarrassment of being stuck inside a crazy amphibian, especially in front of Hisoka. Now that you think about it, being stuck inside a frog was embarrassing on its own accord. You looked down at yourself, and berate your choice of colours. How had you not opted for a darker colour of shirt, why did it have to be white today of all days? The slime made the fabric completely see through.

“I don’t want to leave I don’t want to leave-“

You are so entranced in your own emotion that you barely noticed the loud crash, and cease in your movement.

“I don’t wanna leave-“

You are sniffling comically with a face that could match the pink of the frog’s insides. A ray of light makes its way to you and you realise that someone is cutting a hole in your vessel. A squeal escapes your lips and you try your best to hide- but when you’re inside a frog, there are no good hiding places.

“(Y/N)!” It was Gon’s cheery voice that greeted you.

Next to him, Killua burst into laughter at the sight of you. You just wanted to shrink back into the frog all over again but you convinced yourself that you couldn’t hide. You needed to move forward and become a hunter. It was what you chased, after all. For a moment, you hear a loud ringing. You bring a hand to your forehead to steady yourself. Your surroundings turn to static, but reform normally soon after. Huh? What were you chasing again?


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, I got kind of bored writing this chapter since it's pretty much the anime episode + a bit more. I kinda wish I put a HUUGGEE timeskip through the cooking and hunting part, actually just this whole chapter in general. T-T alas.  
> I'm really excited to write the trick tower episode though cause I feel like that's where the story will really move, so like next chapter, or the chapter after. And since its the weekend soon, yay a whole 2 days to wallow in a fictional world ღවꇳවღ

It was needless to say that you spent the whole of Menchi’s introduction sulking in a cloud of pure embarrassment. The strange static, which had previously buzzed through your brain left your memory, and instead you chose to focus on the new addition to your collection of embarrassing stories. You are currently being dragged along by Gon and Killua to find the wild pigs which was to be prepared for the exam. The entirety of your body is still drenched in frog slime, and unfortunately, your white shirt was pretty much see through.

“How am I going to marry him when I’ve looked like this in public!” You accidentally whine, out loud.

“Marry who?” Gon’s response is innocent.

You instantly hang your head. There goes another miscalculation in your day so far. The whole exam has made you want to hide under the safety of a blanket, but not for the reasons you would have thought.

“What’s this? (Y/N) has a crush?” Killua teases, with a cat like smile spread across his face.

“Wow! What’s he like, (Y/N), where’s he from? What’s his name? Have you been on dates? Why haven’t you told me before!” Gon interrogates

“I-He-“

Your pitiful attempt at formulating a response is cut off by Leorio’s scream. All eyes immediately dart to him. He had tripped on a branch and is tumbling down a shallow hill, briefcase in hand. You couldn’t help but laugh at his misfortune, and you’re glad that someone else had embarrassed themselves. The joyful atmosphere was soon cut off by a stampede of pigs, which had noticed the group of you. All 5 of you proceed to make a mad dash towards the rest of the applicants.

“Run!”

The area is in chaos, dust clouds left behind by pigs, and people flying everywhere as they get headbutted by the monsters. It definitely was a site to see, the havoc of the Great Stamp, the world’s most ferocious pigs.

“Say, (Y/N), you wouldn’t be able to carve your way inside this animal too, would you?” Killua suggests with a smirk.

You are about to retort, but a pig slams into the tree right next to you. The debris from the broken tree scrapes against you. You decide you can just give him a smack later. When the pig turns its focus back onto you, you are forced back onto the run.

“Ah! The weak point is the forehead!” Gon calls from somewhere far to your left.

With a grin, you jump overhead the charging pig and land on top of its body. You jab two fingers into the soft flesh above its eyes, and watch as it collapses under you.

“Thanks, Gon!” You call back.

It isn’t long before all 5 of you had caught your respective pigs. You lug the bulky carcass back towards the stone gates, wondering how on earth you will prepare all the meat. Everyone else seemed to be spit-roasting the pig over a fire. This observation makes you frown. There was no way that method of preparation would result in a desirable texture or taste.

“Well, let’s get started.”

As you started the preparations, the examinees begin to line up, waiting for their food to be tested. You watch as Buhara takes a bite out of the burnt meat. It surprises you that he savours the flavour and swallows in appreciation.

“Delicious!” He compliments, scarfing down more food.

His approval is followed by a loud buzz, as Menchi raises a circle with an X printed on it.

“It’s overcooked. The tough flavour ruins the taste of the meat.” She sighs.

You could only nod in agreement, however on such a large and active animal, it was unlikely that their meat would be tender. You frown, observing the anatomy of the pig. The most likely areas for underworked meat would be the belly. The problem was, you didn’t know the first thing about butchering a pig, and accidentally cutting into the organs would ruin the taste.

“The insides are uncooked, and the outside is charred. The fire was obviously too strong.” Menchi states, her words followed by another buzz.

You guess you have no choice but to try. You pressed a knife against the animal’s underside, amazed at how soft it was. A small amount of pressure sliced through the skin and fat as easily as butter. You push into the flesh a bit further, and feel the blade cut through the slightly harder meat. Hoping you had approximated the right depth, you form a rectangular shape in its belly then separate the cut of meat from the carcass. You throw the it onto the bench and proceed to slice it into rectangular strips. From below the worktable, you find a few spices, and shook the fine flakes onto the strips of meat. You could barely comprehend the labels on the containers, so you could only hope the resulting dish would taste good. Pushing sticks through the length of the strips, you begin to roast it over the fire.

“Is this supposed to be a kiddy meal ?!”

You flinch at the volume of Menchi’s voice, blocking your ears as you see Gon present his creation.

“This is basically the same thing!”

Next would be Kurapika’s cooking, which you applaud.

“Finally, something that resembles an actual dish.”

You watch as Menchi lifts her fork with a frown, taking her first bite of the dishes that were presented to her. She pauses to chew before her eyebrows furrow even deeper.

“Yuck!”

Her expression of disgust is accompanied by her flipping the entire dish away.

“Appearance is important only if taste is good, you’re no better than #403.”

As she comments on Kurapika’s cooking, you’ve noticed that your own dish is about ready to serve. You pull it off the skewer and transfer it to a plate to bring it to the judges, but just as you place your hands around the plate, Buhara stands up.

“Okay, that’s it! I’m stuffed.” He sings, patting his belly.

“Yeah. I’m stuffed too.” Menchi agrees, “therefore, none of you pass. We’re finished!”

You are horrified at the outcome, and reach out to her.

“Wait! I haven’t had a turn yet!” You protest, holding forward the plate

“Well, maybe you should have finished sooner.” Menchi retorts.

~

The chairman did not agree to the results. He reprimanded Menchi’s decisions, and commanded her to put everyone through another test. The second exam was a lot more fun, with an enjoyable result. After everyone had picked their own egg, they were all boiled, and the examinees who passed were allowed to eat them.

“It tastes delicious!”

You can hear the praise for its taste all around you. As you look around, you catch a glimpse of fiery red hair.

_Hisoka-_

As soon as you are reminded of him, a buzz of static shoots through your mind, making you dizzy. Your surroundings spun slightly.

_Hisoka? Who’s that?_


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok im gonna put the notes about this chapter at the bottom so I don’t spoil it but yeah. This was a fun chapter to write, and honestly the scene where Hisoka fights Togari is one of my favourite scenes in the anime. I honestly don’t think I was living until I saw it. Like dayum, he needs to kill me so I can chill.  
>  Also I'm sorry for any mistakes and typos, its like 6 am here and i wanna sleep, i'll edit it tomorrow whenever i wake up. hahah '-';  
>  Okay, anyway, enjoy.  
>  Update: Editting in progress hello  
>  Update: I think I've finished editing. I hope. I'm gonna work on the next chapter now.

The chairman had given all 43 remaining examinees free reign of the airship, allowing them to choose what to do and where to go. You had told your friends that you’d split up with them to do some exploring on your own.

“I needa look for something” You had informed them, and when they asked about it, you had replied honestly, “I don’t really remember.”

You are now wondering the halls, trying to find a stimulus to trigger your memory. The whistle of cardboard flying through the air catches your attention, and you barely manage to dodge the card that came flying at you. The said projectile embeds itself in the wall behind you. Immediately, you turn to look at the source of the weapon.

“Yo, (Y/N). ♥” A voice sings from behind you.

You feel a wave of nostalgia rush through your body, however you’re not sure why. As you turn to face the direction the voice came from, you feel a breeze pass by. Slender hands cover your eyes and a prickling sensation stings against your cheeks.

“Guess who~”

You pause, you must know this person then. The voice does bring a feeling of adrenaline, but you couldn’t derive exactly who it was. _Hisoka._ As soon as the name enters your mind, it is gone again. Replaced by a high-pitched whir that worked to both daze and annoy you.

“Who?” You ask

Your voice is calm despite the internal strife you felt, and the constant ringing in your mind which irritated you to no end.

“(Y/N), don’t tease me like that. ♦” His tone is low, and his breath against the shell of your ear makes you shiver.

“I’m not! I genuinely don’t know who you are!” You protest, trying to pull his arms away from your eyes.

"Oh? Is that so? How unfortunate. ♠" 

Light returns to your eyes when he finally moves his hands away. You scan the area around you, but he had vanished. With a sigh, you continue your exploration of the ship. The buzz had disappeared from your mind and the encounter makes you realise how tired you were. The next corner you turn reveals a room with a few bunk beds. You are grateful, immediately entering the room and closing the door behind you. As soon as you lay down on the extremely soft mattress, your eyes shut and your mind goes blank.

~

It isn’t exactly a dream, more of a highlight reel. It took you back to the training you pushed yourself through to become stronger. After you decided to save up for travelling, you knew strength would be an unquestionable necessity to your future journeys. On the first day, you could barely do 3 push ups, got tired after 20 squats, gave up after a 400-metre sprint. You even tried to pick fights with people to test your own ability. You went home embarrassed after the gang you had annoyed completely beat you up. Day by day, you trained to strengthen yourself. The burning determination felt so comfortable, pushing you until you were shaking, not letting up until you collapsed from exhaustion. The ache you felt in the seconds after the exertion was so satisfying. Within a year you had improved a lot, managing 250 push ups, 487 squats, and 21 kilometres of jogging along with various other exercises you learnt to do within the months. You even won a match against 2 of the best fighters in your town. You were so thrilled. After that day, you got on a boat and embarked on your own adventures.

On your travels you had found a man who recognised your potential. He taught you to fight and analyse your opponents- different fighting styles and how to beat them, how to recognise feints, and decide their next move from subtle hints in their body language. After half a year of training he told you to become a hunter. 

"There's a limit to how much I can teach you if you decide against it. I can tell you now that you won't be able to learn much more without a license."

~

The entire hall is suffocated with Hisoka’s bloodlust. The aura swirls in tainted shades of purple. A house of cards stands in front of the magician, almost complete.

“What an unfortunate intrusion. Being used in such a way. ♠” Hisoka purrs in a breathy groan.

The sound of plastic tapping against each other rings through the room as the magician places the final two cards at the top of the structure.

“I can hardly wait. ♦”

The bloodlust expanded, and every hunter on the ship could probably feel it. A tap against the top of the house of cards is enough for all 6 levels to collapse.

~

You are woken by the growl of your stomach, and you realise the only thing you ate in the last exhausting 24 hours was an egg. No one else had entered the room around you, and you were grateful. You thoroughly regret passing out without taking a shower- the slime had dried into an uncomfortable crust, which made grotesque crunching noises each time you move. The feeling keeps you on edge, and you decide to take a quick shower. The hot water feels refreshing against your skin, the steam easing your mind.  You then proceed to wash your clothes and squeeze out the water. After you are done cleaning yourself, you venture to the halls of the airship to look for food. Your eyes light up when you find the kitchen where plates full of fresh meat, eggs, and rice line the bench in front of you. You shovel a plate full of fried rice into your mouth, and manage to snatch a container full of chicken wings before you are kicked out, and told to go to the dining hall. You are looking out the window, admiring the view of the mountains below when a tone plays on a nearby loudspeaker.

“Everyone, I’m sorry for the wait. The airship will arrive at it’s destination soon.” A voice announces.

This prompts you to look towards the direction the ship is travelling towards, and your heart beats faster in anticipation.

“How did they build this in the middle of nowhere?” You wonder in awe.

Soon, the airship lands on top of the tower. Everyone dispatches off the ship, observing their surroundings in admiration. It truly is a beautiful view, and you briefly think to a photographer from your home town that you had become close friends with. She would have loved to take photos from this tower. All examinee’s gather around the middle of the tower to listen to Beans' explanation.

“Now then, you have 72 hours to get to the bottom of this tower. With that, we will begin the third phase of the examination.”

As people begin to disperse, you walk towards the edge of the tower. You took 2 steps, before you feel a shift beneath your feet. With a yelp, you are falling. The thud of your landing echoed around the empty, dim lit room you find yourself in. You prop yourself onto your elbows, studying the torches the loudspeaker, and the stand with a single armband on top. As soon as you push yourself back onto your feet to retrieve your armband, a voice booms from the speaker.

“Welcome, contestant, to trick tower! As you have found your way here, allow me to explain. My name is Lippo, and I am the prison warden here, also the examiner of the third phase. You have chosen the path of ‘The Arena’. This phase consists of multiple pathways which you can take to get to the very bottom, as decided by your wristband, but do choose carefully. As a warning, this tower may be your death. The tower itself is 70 metres tall, and there are 30 floors. That aside, you have 71 hours, 57 minutes and 30 seconds remaining. Good luck, ma’am!”

A burst of static sounds before the connection to the examiner is cut off. As soon as you equip your armband, a large metal door appears on one wall. With a sigh, you approach it.

_At this door, select O to open and X not to open._

You press O, and the exit rumbles open. You are met with a long brick corridor, lit by torches. On the left wall, there are portraits. The photos are numbered chronologically from 1 through to 10, and the subject of each picture holds a plate with a date and name and is clad in loose brown attire. When you reach the end of corridor, there is a picture which looked like a recent addition. While the previous pictures were all integrated into the brick, the last stood out awkwardly, as if stuck on with glue or some other similar substance. The man in the picture wore a colourful shirt, and did not hold the black rectangular card which was featured in all the other portraits. You conclude that it was probably the examiner, and continue. A screen awaits you at the end of the corridor, along with another door.

_Are you ready? Select O for yes and X for no._

As soon as you move to press the O button, the voice of the examiner speaks out.

“Allow me to shed some information. Kukukuku.” This sharpness of his tone makes you cringe. “Beyond that door is a criminal who was charged with 12 counts of murder and 11 counts of grievous bodily harm. In other words, he tortured all those people before putting them out of their pain. He has been sentenced to 476 years in this prison. I’d hate to see a girl like you suffering for 71 hours, so I’ll let you make a more educated decision.”

A murderer? The examiner’s words makes blood rush to your head. You pull out the dagger from your back pack, and your jaw tenses in anger.

“Don’t worry, I’ll kill him.” Your voice is devoid of sympathy.

The door rises as soon as you press the O button on your wristband. You step forward into a huge semi-circular room with two sets of stairs leading downwards on the edges of the room. A chandelier hung from the ceiling, the only source of illumination. Under the crystalline décor stands a muscular man. His black hair is cropped close to his scalp and his brown eyes can only be described as lecherous. He holds a large butchers knife, grinning as you, licking his lips. The sight of him consumes you in a fresh wave of bloodlust. You stare back at him with cold eyes.

“It’s been a while since I’ve heard a lady screaming. I can’t say I’m sorry for-“

His gruff voice barely finishes his introduction before his head is detached from his neck. The dagger you had chosen out was fine indeed- cutting so swiftly even through bone. Your heartbeat increases at the thought of your own actions, but it doesn’t shake you, after all this wasn’t the first time you had killed a man. You look back towards the corpse. The sight is gruesome, and you can feel bile rising up your throat. Slowly, you move to wrap a cloth around his head and body which becomes completely soaked in blood. The rusty smell of his blood overwhelms your senses. You swallow the urge to gag. You use this to pull the body with you as you descend the stairs to the next level. You remembered the man you just killed, he was number 1 in the series of pictures you passed which lined the walls of the first corridor of the tower. So, this is what ‘The Arena’ meant.

On the next floor, you find the entire room to be circular. Similar stairs descend on either side of the chamber. This time, there is no one waiting to fight you. Instead, a sign stood in the centre, reading ‘ _Chance’_. At the base of the sign was a dice with 12 faces. 11 of the faces were red, and the remaining one was white. You roll the dice, watching as it landed on one of the red faces. You head the grinding of stones beneath your feet and quickly move off when a separation appears in the floor. Milliseconds later, the slab of stone you stood on smashed against the roof and turned to rubble. You breath a sigh of relief before continuing down the stairs.

The third floor down was a maze. Prison bars create a series of fences which stood between you and the stairs. Dogs are chained to the bars, which you could see that you had to pass through to reach the exit. The flaw with the challenge was that the bars on each barricade were wide enough for you to slip through, however the body you had dragged with you was too bulky. You also felt the urge to free the dogs chained to the bars. With a sigh you approach the first dog, which barks aggressively. A particular vicious snarl in your direction marks you flinch away, but it seems slightly calmer when you drop to your knees. You extend your arm, allowing it to sniff your hand, and it seems to instantly relax. The animal bows its head, and pushes itself against your hand, as if asking for you to pet it. You oblige, stroking it’s black fur. With your other hand, you unclip the chain on the collar of the dog. You pick up the fabric wrapping the corpse, and continue to free each of the 7 remaining dogs. At the end of the maze, you whistle for each canine to follow you down the stairs.

_Are you ready? Select O for yes and X for no._

On the fourth floor was another door, which you assumed to be the second arena battle. You don’t hesitate to press O, and prepare yourself to execute this opponent much faster than the first. You slide under the gap as soon as you could fit. This time, your victim is a lanky blond man with a baseball bat in hand. He barely has time to turn his attention to your form when you dash towards him. All he can muster is a blow to the side of your leg, which you take in exchange for your own attack. The difference was that you severed his jugular vein, efficiently killing him.

~

One of your most memorable conversations with Hisoka addressed your view on murder. You had never focused on the concept before he asked you about it, and you would have never guessed that it was so important to you.

“I don’t think it’s right. I hate people who take life without reason.” You declared

“Oh~? Then do you hate me?” Hisoka prompted,

Of course, you had thought he was referring to the men he killed, who had tried to steal from your home.

“Of course not, you had a reason. Criminals are better off dead.”

“And does prison not seem like a merciful alternative? ”

You shook your head. “To me, freedom is the most important thing. A prisoner would probably prefer captivity over death, but I don’t want to see from the perspective of someone I hate”

~

You bind the body of this man in a similar way to how you had tied the first one. You had intentionally kept his body intact this time as it would be easier to carry to the bottom of the tower. Pulling the two men along, you descend the next flight of stairs. The fifth floor had the same layout as the second. A dice in the middle surrounded by stairs. This time you ignore the dice and continue downwards. What you see on the sixth floor confirms your theory about the pattern of the tower. It was another puzzle, similar to the third floor. The floor consisted of a series of lasers and a few mirrors. A piece of paper in front of you instructed that the laser beams could be turned off if 3 beams were focused on a single laser emitter. The task was easy, and you complete it within minutes. At the base of the next flight of stairs was the same door as before.

_Are you ready? Select O for yes and X for no._

Number 3 was a woman with her hair slicked back into a ponytail, armed with 2 pistols. You had broken her legs and executed her as she kneeled in front of you with a bullet through her brain. Number 4 was a man with greying hair. He looked to be in his mid-40s, and fought with his bare firsts. It took almost a minute before you could end his life. His cause of death was fatal brain trauma, after you kicked his head against the hard stone floor. Number 5 was a young woman, by far the most sinister. She taunted you many times, and threatened to harm the dogs which were waiting obediently by the entrance. That however was also what ultimately brought upon her demise. A Doberman and a German shepherd held her down when she tried to use them as hostages, allowing you to stab your blade through her heart. On the 15th floor, the examiner congratulated you.

“You’ve made it half of the way through in one hour. I offer my compliments.”

Number 6 died the most gruesome death. At that point, you noted that each prisoner got stronger with their number. You used the gun belonging to Number 3 against this man. He was both agile and strong, so you felt as if you had no choice. He ended up bleeding to death from numerous lacerations and bullet wounds after 15 minutes. Number 7 gave up, when she saw the body of Number 6. She fell to her knees and begged you to kill her. The two had been in love, and you felt a tinge of sorrow for the girl. In the end, you gave her a painless death, breaking her neck with a rope made from the brown canvas she was wearing. Number 8 was unlucky and tripped against an uneven patch of flooring. He could barely dodge in time to save his life. You had aimed for his heart, but his movement caused you to pierce his lungs instead. He instantly passed out from the pain, and suffocated to death within minutes. Number 9 was the strongest of all. His skin was sturdy, and he had the brute force of a truck. He easily tripled your size, and your dagger only left shallow scratches on his body. You risked closed quarter combat, and when you saw an opening, lunged to shoot him in the eye. He had brought his hands to cradle the wound, screaming in pain. At that second you had the barrel of the pistol in his mouth, and pulled the trigger. You thought you had blown his brains out, but he was still swinging wildly at your form. A bullet through his temple finally put him out of his misery, and he joined your collection of corpses. On the 28th floor is a letter surrounded by rose petals. Candles line the edge of the room, and you extinguish 10, placing them in your bag.

"I'll be borrowing these." 

You ignore the letter which replaced the dice in the centre of the room. You notice that one set of stairs in the room is guarded by a metallic door, and investigate this irregularity.

_Are you sure? Select O for yes and X for no._

The phrasing of this question was different, and the fact concerned you. The answer to your suspicions are probably addressed in the letter, however, you recklessly choose to proceed without the knowledge. A quick tap of the O button raises the barricade. The next floor is also lit by candles, however the wax is a sinister red. A cloaked figure stands in the centre of the room. The image sends a chill down your spine.

“Are you the examiner?” Your voice cuts the deafening silence.

The figure turns to you, and you recognise his face as the last picture in the corridor you entered through.

“First, contact with the bound person. Second, an extreme emotion. Third, abnormal impact upon the brain. This triggers the first stage of my Nen.”

“What on earth are you talking about?”

“You’re Hisoka’s little friend, right?”

As soon as the magicians name leaves his lips, your brain buzzes. Images of Hisoka flash in your mind. The memories feel like shocks of lightning, striking both confusion and recognition in different parts of your brain. You clutch at your head, swaying in disarray. You see the next flight of stairs in front of you, and stumble in the general direction, hoping for a distraction that would allow you to get away.

“Fourth. Contact with the manipulator.”

The voice is right behind you and you instinctively take out your pistol. You pull the trigger, aiming at his forehead. The shot hits, and you relax for a second until you realise that it barely pierced his skin. The man jumps backwards, and the bullet falls to the floor in front of you. You take the chance to propel yourself backwards, and create as much distance as possible. From your position, you can see that there is another door down the stairs, and curse. You position yourself in a defensive crouch, watching as he begins to walk around you.

“(Y/N), let me tell you a story.”

You maintain your pose, staring him in the eye as he begins to talk.

“4 years ago, there was a normal man, who had a lover. He adored that woman more than anyone in the world. She was beautiful, and the kindest human in the world.”

You move further backwards as he closes in on you.

“One day, the woman went to an amusement park with her friends, the group of them had fun. The woman texted the man a picture with all of them laughing.”

He pauses wordlessly to stare at you, and you take the disruption in his movements to move to another position in the hall which was further away from him. He smiles at your actions before continuing the story, and approaching you again.

“The woman and her friends were sitting on a bench when they witnessed an encounter. It was between two men, a magician and a hunter.”

A haze fills your mind, but you again move to another position to stay away from the man. As he tells you his story, your mind is racing for the next course of action. A bullet barely left a scratch on him, what could you do?

“Do you know who lost, (Y/N)? Everyone except for the magician.”

Your grip tightens on the hilt of your dagger, which you had tucked against waistband of your shorts.

“That’s right, your precious Hisoka killed everyone there.” He spits out the name as if it were poison.

The name sends another dizzying ring of static through your mind, but you were getting used to the disorientating feeling. The man is charging at you in a fit of rage, hands outstretched.

“I lost my most precious possession that day!” He screams.

You boost yourself upwards, pulling your leg away as he grabs for it. In the middle of his craze motion, you land a kick against his chin causing him to stumble backwards. He is visibly affected by the kick, and again, you switch positions while he regains his composure. It was strange, he wasn’t affected by the bullet, yet your kick affected him. You frown, trying to evaluate the situation, you list out all the differences between a bullet and the kick.

“Come here! I’m going to kill him!”

He charges at you again, and this time you fire a shot at his body. Immediately he pauses the punch he attempts to throw at you, and the bullet ricochets off his body. You back up into a different corner of the room this time. The strength he relied on had to be something to do with his concentration, you deduce. You study his form, looking for potential weaknesses to exploit.

“You can’t run forever.” The man proclaims, throwing his fist at you again.

You dodge to your right when you notice he would reach for you with his right hand each time. You press your pistol against his arm and this time the bullet rips through his flesh. He lets out a wail of frustration and agony, covering his left forearm. The damage you had inflicted gives you another chance to escape from his range, positioning yourself against the opposite wall.

“I’ll give you a painful death in front of him!”

Again, he makes a mad dash towards you with a punch aimed at your face. This time, you let yourself get hit. A blow for a blow, but the one you deliver is fatal. Your dagger pierces his neck, severing his airways and an important artery. At the same time, your vision goes dark. In the seconds the man had to live, he tries his best to control you. With blank eyes, aim the pistol to your head and fire. He is smiling when the life slips from his body, thinking that he had killed you.

~

Two examiners watch over the fight, excited, anxious, anticipating the result.

“Usually a person’s Nen will manifest when they die, especially when it was initially cast with a grudge. Maybe we should have stepped in.” A bald man with thick lips ponders

The smaller man, Lippo, waves off the idea, “This man’s Nen was anything but strong. And he only knew manipulator techniques. An extremely weak manipulator- What will that achieve. Besides, the object he was using to control her has already fallen off.”

~

“What was that?” You wonder when your eyes flutter open again.

Fortunately for you, the gun ran out of bullets. You make a feeble attempt at propping yourself upwards, dragging the mans corpse towards the 9 bodies which awaited you at the near the stairway downwards.

_Are you ready? Select O for yes and X for no._

You manage to move a tiresome hand to press the O button, knowing that there would be no more danger awaiting you. Floor 30, the lowest floor. The wooden exit rises in front of you, and you stumble out.

“Number 304, (Y/N), fourth to pass the third phase. Total time, 12 hours and 5 minutes.”

As soon as you pull the bodies through the doors, fatigue overwhelms you. Your eyes flicker shut and your legs give out. Your body collapses atop the cold stone ground with a dull thud.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried my best to make the reader morally ambiguous like all of togashi's characters, but i also feel like i skimmed over the history and morals too briefly. T-T I thought a 4.5 k word count for a single chapter was getting to be too much tbh, so i just stopped. I shall do my best to fix this in the future. <:  
> I was also tempted to not kill off the antagonist i introduced since it was a bit of a waste, but then i realised i didnt even bother naming him so, oh well, he's just another bg character who dies. Bye bye, unnamed man.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alas I thought i would've finished this chapter faster than I did but I was out all day today. tbh I feel a bit hesitant to post this chapter bc i dont know if i like the direction im going in, so if there is a sudden un-flowy change in the near future. hah. i should have planned better. '-';;  
> On a side note, the hours don't add up so just uhhhh tru to ignore that lapse in detail.

On the day before your 11th birthday, you and Hisoka sat under a stone bridge, next to a small creek.

 “Say, (Y/N), what type of person do you think I am?”

“A free spirit.”

“And?”  

“I think you’re a liar, who is deceitful and selfish.”

Hisoka chuckles at your honestly.

“So why do you remain friends with me?”

“Why not? ”

“Oh? ♠”

He raised his hand, and with a twitch of his index finger, you felt immense pressure around your neck. It was as if a uniform rope was strangling you. Your eyes widened, and your hands shot to your neck, trying to pull the entity away to no avail. Your vision began to fade when the tightness released you.

“You should be more careful about who you befriend,”

Immediately you caressed the area where pressure had been applied on your neck. You glared at him in a defiant manner. 

“Even if you pretend to be a bad person you won’t keep me away.” You declared.

“Pretend? ♠” He echoed inquisitively.

~

In retrospect, you should have probably rested on the previous floor before you passed out in a room full of killers. The panic of having left yourself so vulnerable causes you to dart upright when you are woken up. The cause of this disturbance in your sleep is dog saliva. The Pitbull, which had wiggled its way under your head, was drooling all over your face and neck as it slept. The sudden absence of your warmth startles it, and it wakes up just as you do. For a few moments, you feel as if everything is alright, the presence of the animals was calming. When you lift your head however, you begin to notice your surroundings. The first thing you draw your attention to is the mountain of corpses behind you. The memories of their deaths are fresh in your mind. The gruesome recollection sends an uneasy feeling to your stomach. You soon move on to take note of the time on your wristband.

  _42 hours 22 minutes left before the stage is over._

You had been unconscious for 8 hours. Continuing your observations, you glance towards the other examinees in the room. There are still three other people in the room, meaning that no one had reached the bottom of the tower in the time you were unconscious. Your scrutiny focuses on Hisoka. Suddenly, you recall the strange events of the last day, which all seem to point in accusation at his direction. The buzz which disrupted your memory each time you thought his name had disappeared. You assume that the source of the agitating sensation was the man you had killed on the 29th floor. With a frown, the words he spoke replayed in your mind.

_‘First, contact with the bound person. Second, an extreme emotion. Third, abnormal impact upon the brain. This triggers the first stage of my Nen’_

Contact with the bound person, probably Hisoka. An extreme emotion, you can think many instances during which you were abnormally sensitive throughout the exam. Abnormal impact upon the brain, this condition stumps you. Even so, this meant that two of three conditions had been fulfilled by the time the ringing started. Did that mean the agitating noises was a part of his ‘Nen’? You frown, contemplating the definition of the word. From the information you were given, perhaps it was a device planted on you, which turned on when all conditions were met. But then, was it related to the reason he had not been harmed by a bullet? You shake your head- one tool couldn’t fulfil two such different purposes, that was impossible. The lack of logic in the whole situation scrambles your thoughts- what was even more confusing was the next condition.

_Fourth. Contact with the manipulator._

What did he mean by manipulator? If this ‘Nen’ is the device which caused the ringing, why would he need to make contact with it? Your mind brings back the memory of when the man had landed his punch. Your vision had gone black back then, and when you woke up, he was already deceased. Does the device turn off when the owner dies? But is that even possible- how does that make sense? The more evidence you have, the less the pieces fit together.

“Fuck.” You curse in frustration.

You give yourself a hard slap on both cheeks, trying to concentrate on what other information you could make use of. Briefly, you raise your line of sight, fixating it on Hisoka’s resting figure. You wonder if he would answer if you asked him, and if that answer would have any trace of the truth within it. After all, the reason you were caught up in that mess was because of him. You recall the story the man had told you, speculating how true the recounted events were.

_That’s right, your precious Hisoka killed everyone there_

Again, your thoughts are thrown into peril. Your chest is aflame with dissatisfaction and your mind is a mess of contradicting thoughts. You focus your attention on Hisoka, wanting to approach him, but your brain is empty of any trail of thought which made sense. You have no idea what to say to him.

“Hisoka.” Your address is infinitely softer than you had intended, and you don’t see him respond.

You pick yourself up, drawing closer to him with a timid shuffle. Your lack of confidence surprises you, and you attribute this abnormal behaviour to the confusion you feel. The other two in the hall seem to pay you no heed. When you are mere inches from his seated figure, you call his name again.

“Hisoka.” This time, the sound of his name is slightly more audible.

He raises his gaze to you, topaz eyes narrowing as if in warning. Of course, you ignore the gesture which was meant to intimidate you. He should have known you better than that.

“Hisoka!” Now, your voice is raised.

Your volume surprises even yourself, and the subsequent surge emotions and actions shocks you even more. You aren’t sure where the overwhelming sensation of sorrow is coming from, but you cannot stop yourself. It is probably the constant frustration of being so perplexed by a theory you couldn’t figure out which breaks a dam of emotions in your chest. Maybe, you are finally starting to understand the reality which was never forced upon you. You grab at the white fabric of his shirt, pulling him forward, and throwing a desperate punch at his face. He makes no effort to dodge, instead his narrow eyes are trained on your expression.

“Why?” You demand, pressing his body harshly against the tiled wall.

He remains silent, a light scowl frames his lips. You raise your fist to throw another attack in his direction. As soon as the attack is about to make contact, your wrist is restricted in a firm grip. No matter which way you twist your arm, you cannot escape the vice-like imprisonment around your arm.

“I don’t think you realise how weak you are, (Y/N). ”

The grip strengthens, and you grind your teeth together in pain. It feels as if your bones were about to crack under the pressure. You aim a blow at his abdomen. Again, your hand is restricted before you can do anything else. He pulls you towards him, until you are merely inches away from him. The displeasure in his eyes is plain to see. You can feel the bloodlust radiating from him.

“You’re a mere nuisance right now.”

Before you can comprehend the situation, you are thrown backwards, and sent crashing against a wall. Fragments of rubble fall around you. A droplet of warm liquid slides down the back of your neck. It was a futile fight, you had always known, but witnessing his speed used against you works to solidify that fact into reality. The realisation clears your mind.

“You’re in my way. ♠”

It was a death threat. One that you can’t even fight against. If you were to attack him now, you would most probably be added to the pile of corpses in an instant. You push yourself onto your feet again, and make your way over to grab the makeshift rope connecting each prisoner you had executed. The sound of their flesh grating against the unforgiving concrete is the most distinctive noise in the room. You stand at a semi-circular wall, opposite to the door which you exited the trials from.

“Open this exit.” You command, driving a first into the metal gate which seemed to lead outside.

Your pupils are contracted when you glare into the lens of one of the security cameras. The door to the tower’s exit slowly slides upwards, allowing rays of light to filter into the bottom floor of the structure.

“I’ll be waiting outside, then.”

Your limbs move sluggishly, as if on autopilot and barely pay heed to the doors which open as you exit. You drag the bodies out of the tower with you.

“Number 50, Pokkle, Number 371, Goz, arrived simultaneously, total time, 30 hours, 4 minutes.”

~

The surrounding area is covered in trees and shrubbery. You feel guilty for laying them to rest on a prison island, but taking them through the rest of the exam would be impossible. Two twigs are used to start an impromptu fire, and you light each of the candles you had borrowed from the tower. They flicker to life in a bright, joyous dance. Each candle is lit up in line with a body. You sink to your knees, placing the palms of your hands together and close your eyes.

“Good night.” You whisper with a bow.

The sun had almost set when you leave the bodies. When you turn around one last time, the scene in front of you is a perfect painting of serendipity. The wind is gentle, yet strong enough to dishevel the trees. Their branches sway, tantamount to an orchestra. Petals fall around the graves- Delphiniums, Wisterias, White lilacs. Under the azure of the darkening sky, dancing flames illuminate the hues of purple and white of each flower. The tranquil image calms your restless mind to a halt. The corners of your lips rise into a faint smile, before you continue your path away from the final resting place of the prisoners.  

“42 hours left.” You note to yourself when you check the wristband.

On the other side of the tower is a stretch of coast. You lie down on the grassy area behind the shore. Your brain felt tired from all the information you had tried to process earlier that day. With a cleared mind, you decide that you will stop thinking about the strange occurrence for now, and that your master would be a reliable mentor to ask about the incident. Your eyes flutter shut into a peaceful nap.

Eventually the growling of your stomach forces you to get up and search for food. You decide that a rocky area nearby will be a reliable source of seafood. You light-heartedly make your way to the area. Reeds nearby allow you to weave a messy basket where you will store your catches. Keeping it on a nearby rock, you begin to collect food. Your dagger is extremely useful to pry large mussels off their habitat. Your basket is almost full when you notice a large crab moving under a large boulder. The thought of crab meat entices you into leaning down to grab the crustacean. When you turn your head to locate the basket, the crab’s pincers grab your hand.

“Fuck!” You squeak

You instinctively letting go and pulling your hand in the opposite direction. It’s shell smacks against a large stone, and stops moving. With a sigh, you pull it off you, adding it to your poorly made basket. When you are satisfied with the amount of food gathered, you quickly fetch some dried leaves, small rocks and twigs. You start a fire to cook what you had gathered. Birds and bugs are chirping around you and you look up into the sky. It is a midnight blue now, and away from the light pollution of large cities, celestial objects are clearly visible. You proceed to stargaze in a comfortable solitude.

~

You are back to your cheery self by the time the 72 hours is up. You see Gon’s eyes light up when he spots you as he leaves the tower.

“(Y/N)! We thought you didn’t make it!” He chimes

“Bad luck, boy, I finished in 4th place.” You shoot back with a grin.

“Is that so? Well we would have been a lot faster if it wasn’t for Leorio over there.” Killua jokes.

“Oi! Don’t defame me like that!” Leorio interjects, shaking his briefcase in Killuas direction.

In response, the silver haired boy flashes a cheeky catlike smile.

“It’s your fault, idiot.”

The group of you continue your conversations and banter until you reach a precipice where the man who had introduced himself as Lippo stands.

“Ladies and gentlemen, congratulations on escaping trick tower. Only the fourth and the final phase remain.” He points his thumb behind him “The fourth phase will take place over there, Zevil Island. Now then, let us begin.”

He clicks his fingers together, raising it to the air as a tall bald man in yellow attire pushes out a trolley holding a box.

“I will need you to draw lots.”

Immediately, you look around, drawing lots would mean a competition. More information about the other participants would give you an edge. You quickly note the weapons, numbers and appearances of each of the people surrounding you.

“To determine who will hunt and who will be hunted.”

You were 4th to draw. Number 191, the old martial artists who finished trick tower in the 10s rank. You absentmindedly shrug, he seemed easy enough.

“With that, let us depart.”


	9. Chapter 9

You gather with Gon and Killua on the boat, discussing the numbers you picked.

“Don’t worry, my target isn’t either of you.” Gon assures the two of you.

“And neither is mine.” Killua agrees.

"Same. Too bad, right? I'd gladly beat you up." You joke.

“Hah. You wish you could.” Killua retorts, while Gon laughs.

“Okay, Let’s show each other at the same time.”

The three of you reveal to each other your targets. Your attention first turns to Killua’s assigned number first, 199, one of those 3 brothers. You then glance to Gon’s plate. Number 44. You bite your lip. Next to you, Killua lets out a small noise of shock.

“Number 44 is… Seriously?” A pause, “You have really bad luck, don’t you?”

You couldn’t agree more on that sentiment. Hisoka hadn’t even taken you seriously the last time you faced him, and even so, you couldn’t see the limit to his strength. You shiver, and your sympathies go out to him.

“You think so?” He laughs nervously, “Who’s number 199?”

“You don’t know either?” Killua muses.

“Oh!” You interject with a dramatic voice, “It’s him! The one that placed a curse on me. If I reveal his identity, you shall be indebted to me for life!”  

“Oi, oi, stop that it’s creeping me out.” Killua complains

“I was just trying to lighten the mood. Number 199 is one of those 3.” You laugh, sending a side glance towards the 3 brothers chattering behind you. “Honestly, I couldn’t be bothered to differentiate them but they’re always together anyway.”

During your explanation, you see that Gon has started to shake, a smile on his face while his eyebrows crease into a nervous frown. You can’t help but stare, and Killua does as well.

“Gon… Happy or scared, which one is it?” Killua asks

“Eh?” he pauses to think, a bead of sweat slides down his cheek. “Both, I guess...”

~

You are the fourth person to step foot onto the island. As soon as you are out of line of sight, you grab onto a low-hanging branch and use the momentum to swing yourself onto it. The tree isn’t difficult to scale- sturdy branches and thick bush to hide behind. When you are around 8 metres above ground, you jump to the next tree, closer to the shore you came from. As you move closer, you make sure not to ruffle the leaves, and do your best to fade your presence into the background.

“The 12th person may start!” You hear the guide announce.

Peaking you from your position, you see the old man making his way to the forest. He glances around, as other contestants did when they entered the forest. You narrow your eyes, and concentrate on his body language, looking for a sign to tell you whether he had noticed you or not. He scans the vicinity, but never once looks in your general direction. His movements are nervous, and you notice hints of hesitation, uncertainty. As soon as he walks past the tree in front of the one you are perched on, you throw 2 rocks you had pocketed at the direction of the tree diagonal to you. When the first rock hits, the leaves rustle, and he immediately turns to face the tree. Milliseconds after the first rock hits, you launch yourself in his direction. His confusion is obvious from his tentative body language- not sure which direction to protect himself from. Unfortunately for him, he chose the wrong direction. A quick strike to the back of his neck ensured that he was unconscious. You swiftly pull his body out of the line of sight of other contestants, and pull his number plate out from a pocket in his undergarments. A victorious smile forms on your face. Too easy.

“2 minutes has passed, the 13th contestant may start!”

You hear the guides voice in the distance, and instantly leave the body to sprint away from the starting point.

~

You had been running for half an hour. A shallow creek appears in your view, and you slow to a stop. The water is incredibly clear, sparkling like crystals. You take this opportunity to re-hydrate yourself. Your hands cup the liquid, filtering it into your mouth. It tastes sweet, and you savour the feeling of the cool fluid, but you feel the hairs on the back of your neck perk up. Someone is watching you. You continue to act as if nothing is wrong, hoping that person would reveal himself with an attack soon. Sure enough, you hear the whirl of an arrow cutting through air behind you. You instantly turn around, dominant hand rising to grab the projectile. You feel the metal edge graze your palm, however you grip the body before it can hit you. The movement of the arrow wasn’t particularly fast, it wasn’t shot with the intention to kill. Movement catches your attention in the peripheral of your vision. The bowman reveals himself, with a self-assured smile. Alerted by his calm demeanour, you study the arrow again. The tip was coated with your blood, along with another substance. The translucent matter glistens, and your arm begins to feel numb.

“Don’t worry, it’s just a muscle relaxant.”

Your arm trembles, and the arrow falls out of your clasp. Your body feels heavier than usual.

“It’s a shame you’re not my target, but since you ran into my area of cover, I’ll take your badge in precautionary measures.”

Your arm drops to your side, and your head spins. You can feel your body giving in to the drug. You didn’t want to lose here, you had already gathered 6 points. You try to even your breathing, concentrating on your heartbeat. He begins to walk towards you.  

 _I need to immobilise him_.

At the thought, a surge of adrenaline pumps through you. You are filled with determination.

_I want to become a hunter._

Your arms begin to feel hot, as if surrounded by a fire which doesn’t touch your skin. The feeling was as if your flesh is being filled by hot air. The sensation begins to spread to your torso and legs. It engulfs your limbs, and an overwhelming pressure pulls you away from your consciousness.

“M-m-monster!”

The first thing you notice is the blood on your hands. The next thing you notice is the trail of this red liquid leading to a tree in front of you. This directs you to the gruesome image of a writhing boy. His wrists are pinned to the tree by arrows, not even by the sharp metal tip, but by the plastic read end. The fletching stick at grotesque angles out of the hole through the centre of his arms. You can only gag at the vision of the ragged flesh. You fall into a flurry of panic, and begin to approach him in an attempt to free him.

“No! Stay away!” He warns.

His attempt at moving his arms only results in the widening of his wounds. More blood falls down his arms, forming puddles at his feet. You can’t help but flinch.

“Wait, let me help you.”

His panic doesn’t calm

You are desperate, not sure what to do. Innocent lives aren’t yours to take, and the prospect of having placed such an unfair judgement breaks you.

“No! You’ve got it wrong, I don’t know how this happened, I- I-“

_I need to save him._

You want to scream, and once again you feel a strange heat engulf your body. Your eyes flutter close, but this time, you are still conscious. You feel your legs bringing you closer to the boy.

“Stop!”  

You feel yourself pull the arrows out. A tortured scream reverberates through the trees. Your fingers wrap around his wrist, and a feeling akin to steam concentrates at your hands. A moment later, you tug off one of the bands around your wrists, and rip it into two strips. You wrap them around his wrists. You feel the heat enveloping your body begin to dissipate. When it completely disappears, you are left confused and exhausted, staring at the boy in front of you, who could only stare back.

“What just happened?” the both of you ponder.

After seconds of deliberation, he decides to trust you. He sits down with his legs crossed.

“Thank you.” He sighs

“Huh?”

“You did help me, even though I attacked you, after all.”

You also drop down to join him, sitting on your knees. You observe his actions closely, he seems genuine.

“Believe me when I say I’m just as confused as you are. But…. from your reactions, you don’t know what you did, am I right?”

You give a cautious nod in response.

“Well my name’s Pokkle. I’ll tell you the story from my perspective.”

He rubs at the makeshift bandages around his wrists.

“So after you caught the arrow, I saw your hand bleeding. I knew it scratched you so I revealed myself. This muscle relaxant is fast acting and paralyses the whole body, so, as soon as I saw you drop the arrow, I wasn’t afraid to approach you. Usually, the victim should be unconscious within seconds, it actually took slightly longer for you. When your body began to fall I was pretty much next to you, about to take your tag. But then-“

His voice faltered, and you could see a shiver run through his body.

“Then I felt it. It was so strange. I was petrified. I tried to run, but you grabbed my quiver. I let you take it. I kept running. I was ready to give up on becoming a hunter at that second. You were more intimidating than even Hisoka.”

He lets out a nervous laugh. His fingers fidget nervously with the ends of the fabric around his wrists. At the mention of Hisoka, you let out a small gasp. Does that mean you were stronger than Hisoka at that moment?

“You chased after me and so I fired 2 arrows at you in desperation. Before I knew it, I was up against a tree. You held my arms down and had my arrows against them. After you stabbed them through my arms, you stumbled backwards and collapsed.”

“How long was I…. Unconscious for?”

“You woke back up immediately actually, and you can probably recall the rest of the story better than I can.”

“I’m sorry.” You bite your lip, looking downwards. “You didn’t mean to kill me, with that arrow. I could tell, and yet I just went and attacked you.”

“I’m in part to blame as well. My target is number 103, a swordsman named Kyu, and yet I attacked you.” A sigh followed by a nervous chuckle, “What a huge mistake”  

“Oh..” You sigh, not knowing what to say. 

After a few minutes of dreary conversation with the boy, he decides to leave to hunt for his target. You are left with nothing but worrying thoughts you desperately want to ignore. The recent events only added to this strange situation, which you didn’t have enough information to figure out yet.

Eventually you pull yourself up to venture the island. There were many edible berries growing around trees and on the floor of the island. Caves and hollow tree trunks provided natural shelter. You decide on a small cavern in which to settle. After lighting a fire, you lay down beside the source of warmth, trying to keep your thoughts away from the mind-numbing topics haunting your brain.

~

Two days pass until you are interrupted from your routine of gathering food in the morning and exercising in your cave during the day. A swordsman confronts you at the mouth of the cave when you are about to exit. He has small, close set eyes and a swollen nose. He brandishes a sword, threateningly in his right hand. You study his form.

“Too bad you’re cornered. Why don’t you hand over your tag so I don’t have to harm you?” He leers, pointing the sword in your direction.

“You’re a swordsman. You’re left handed, but try to hide that information by wielding with your right hand. Your stance indicates that you’re weak to hand to hand combat, probably having a secondary weapon in your bag.” You list, with a frown, hoping it would intimidate him into leaving.

You are faintly aware of someone following this man, and hoped they'd would make their move before you have to deal with him. 

“Observation skills aren’t going to help you now.” He retorts, leaning forward as if to attack.

“Are you sure?”

You watch his eyes widen, and he turns his body to face backwards. He barely dodges the arrow that skims past his arm, close enough to draw blood.

“That’s too bad then isn’t it.” You reprimand.

The man in front of you stumble for a moment, before collapsing. You see a familiar archer emerge from a bush behind him. Exchanging friendly glances with Pokkle, you wave him a farewell before returning to your shelter.

~

On the last day of the exam, you leave your cavern to find your way back to the starting point.

"The fourth phase of the exam has ended, will the applicants please return to the starting point at once? You will be given an extra hour to do so. If you do not return during this time, you will fail the exam. Furthermore, you are not allowed to swap tags after reaching the starting point, anyone caught doing so will be disqualified immediately."

As you hop from tree to tree, you spot a familiar silver haired boy below you, sauntering to the edge of the forest where the guide and a boat is waiting.

“Killua!”

You hop down next to him, but he assesses you in silence.

“Something’s wrong, (Y/N).” He states.

His eyes seem to see right through you. You let out a sigh, there was no hiding from a professional assassin, was there?

“Well, I’m not too sure myself, but a few days ago, I got hit by an arrow. It had a drug smeared on the end, which was supposed to knock me out. When it hit me, I pretty much passed out, but when I snapped back to reality, it turns out I was fighting. I severely injured my attacker when I wasn’t in control. Everything about it confuses me but I don't know enough to figure it out. I'll need to ask my teacher about this after the exam.”

“So what you’re telling me is that you aren’t stable right now.”

You let out a bitter chuckle.

“Is this the part where you tell me to stay away from you and Gon?”

“Idiot. You’re our friend.” He looks away, “We have to be the ones to keep you in check, don’t we?”

Warmth floods your heart, and you take the opportunity to pull the boy into a tight hug.

“Oi! What do you think you’re doing” He protests, trying to push you away.

You can only laugh, at his reaction.

“Thanks, Killua”

Soon after the conversation, you two make it to the clearing where other examinees had gathered. Among them, Hisoka stands with 4 tags in his hands. Your immediately recall Pokkle's words from your encounter.

' _You were more intimidating than even Hisoka'._

The recollection immediately plants impulsive ideas into your mind. An urge to test the abnormal state of your body sparks within you, despite your lack of understanding. Perhaps it was the emotion towards Hisoka, that you had tried so hard to ignore over the past week, which manifested into to a desire, inexplicable even to you. One more exam, one opportunity to fight him. 


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whoops i changed my mind about the layout bc i realised i dont enjoy writing the past story as much as i enjoy writing this timeline. I changed this back to sth from the past. I'm gonna seperate it into 3 parts so that its like between phases of the matches between you and Hisoka for the final exam phase. 
> 
> tbvh tho i dont rly want to write about those random OCs I made up, and its probs obvious cause theyre shittily developed and those parts feel pretty random. Theyre just for character juxtaposition so bear with me.

Before meeting Hisoka, you were argumentative and completely lost in your own world. Your thoughts would consist of fleeting images of undefined clouds, or purple hydrangeas. Conjurations of your imagination had no purpose, and in the end, neither did you. The world seemed to fall around you in sketches, black white and the tones in between. Tinges of colour would appear when you laughed or cried, yet as your emotions faded, all traces disappeared. You were left wondering where those bright feelings of magenta and sapphire faded off to. So why was there a consistent undertone of red in your heart ever since that night? Through the entire night of being questioned by police, all the interrogations and machines that were strapped to you. It was a good thing that when you lied, you had somehow to manage to even convince yourself. But even so, you didn’t know why you covered for him.

“Thank you. You may leave, Miss (L/N)” The officer in front of you states with a stressed sigh.

With a bow of your head, you walk out of the dark room, joining your mother and little sister. After all accounts were made, the case was passed off as self-defence for you and the three men were fined for armed robbery. This decision only took an hour, apparently being an incredibly unimportant case. Of course, most of their attention was focused on the serial killer currently haunting the town- John Doe. You had passed by many posters on your way home from the police station, worn out from lack of sleep and still irritated from the events which you still had yet to fully process. 

~~

Two children live on either side of your house, and you are on terrible terms with both. The two of them were a couple, apparently, and 3 years older than you. The girl, 14, is called Ari. The two of you used to be friends until she started high school. After she started to spend time with a new friend group, you noticed that she started to mimic their traits, and your personalities could only clash. The boy, named Kenji, is 15 and never used to get along with you or Ari until she changed. Ari had mentioned thinking about him a few times, but you had dismissed this as neutral, or even negative thoughts, and proceeded to talk about how terrible of a person you thought he was. A year after she started high school, she admitted her feelings for him, continuing to tell you how her high school friends were helping her chase after him. This had always seemed like a betrayal to you- a precious friend choosing a boy over you. From then on, you hated them, and made the fact well known. Currently, the two of them are sitting together on Ari’s doorstep, fawning over a comic book. You cast them a dirty glare as you walk past, grinding your heel more harshly than usual against the gravel.

“Hey. I’ve been ignoring it for a while now, but that attitude is hurting Ari.” Kenji’s voice is clear, cutting through your aggravated thoughts.

“Well keep ignoring it. It’s not of your concern.” You shoot back coldly.

“She’s my girlfriend of course it’s my concern.”

“The Ari I know wouldn’t want to be your _girlfriend_.” You spit out the last word, as if poison.

“You obviously didn’t know her well enough did you?” He rebuts

“I know her well enough to know how much she appreciates a trip to the pool on a day like today.” Your voice borderlines on a growl. “Unlike you.”

“Something that shallow?”

“I know how scared she was when her aunt had to be transported to another city on an airship for surgery. I was there with her!”

“That’s no secret, (Y/N).”

“I know how sad she was when you drowned her pet hamster into the fountain on the school trip. She said she hated you. She said she would never forgive you. I’ll never forgive you!”

You glower straight at Kenji, as if challenging him. He flinches. From his reaction, this is something that probably hit close to home, but it did for you too. Seeing Ari’s tear-streaked face that day would have been enough to make a grown man cry. Comforting her through the weeks of mourning, even if only over a pet, that should have been something that warranted eternal friendship, right?

“(Y/N)!”

Apparently not. Ari’s sharp tone snaps you out of your rants. You had never heard her use it against you before, only ever to protect you.

“Maybe… You need to let go of the past… even if a little.”

Your expression becomes vacant at her statement. In your chest, hatred burns. Before the loathing escalates into physical violence, you turn away from them to embrace the comfort of home.

“Forget it.”

You slam the front door to your house with as much strength as you could muster.

~

The next day is a Saturday. Your mother sends you on your weekly errands to go buy food, and in today’s case, some disinfectants and a new shopping pan. You carry a straw basket on your arm for food, and a cloth bag in your hand for the disinfectants and pan. A nearby scream interrupts your steady pace. The distraught sound came from around the corner, and you instantly bolt in that direction.

The next day is a Saturday. Your mother sends you on your weekly errands to go buy food, and in today’s case, some disinfectants and a new shopping pan. You carry a straw basket on your arm for food, and a cloth bag in your hand for the disinfectants and pan. A nearby scream interrupts your steady pace. The distraught sound came from around the corner, and you instantly bolt in that direction. Your eyes widen as you assess the situation. A woman lay on the floor in an alley, half her face is bleeding and the bone structure looks as if it had been crushed. A young girl was hunched over in front of you, coughing up blood. A man hovers above her, preparing another attack. Before you can decide your next actions, a shadow appears behind the man, bringing down their raised arm to slash the man across the face. The motion is so fast you can barely follow it with your eyes. Blood oozes out of the cut that has just been made.

“Hisoka!” The girl on the floor exclaims.

“Out for a walk? How fun. ♥” The voice is eerily familiar, and you immediately recognise it. Hisoka. So that’s his name.

The man makes a break for it, hopping over a building and dashing away. Again, the superhuman ability needed to make this jump startles you. Hisoka notices your presence as soon as the man is out of sight, and turns in your direction.

“Oh? Well if it isn’t (Y/N). You must have an affinity for walking into trouble.”

Something about the tone of his voice reignites the irritation you felt towards him. You march up to him, while being watched their inquisitive eyes, and reach up to slap him right across his face. For a second, you just stand there awkwardly, not knowing what else to do. Immediately, the girl next to him bursts out laughing.

“S-Sorry, it’s just that, she’s half your height and- and you actually- look offended” She forces out between snickers.

At the sound of her laughter, you couldn’t help but giggle along. You end up forgetting all about the grudge that you had previously formed against Hisoka. The three of you sit against the brick wall of the alleyway, waiting for the ambulance to arrive.

“That’s uhm, a strange superhero costume you have on.” You joke with glance at his attire- the same white garments which seemed to imitate that of a jester.

“These situations are painting me in too positive of a light. ♠”

“What do you mean? Did you not intend to save those people?”

“No. They were merely in my way.”

For the rest of your conversation, Hisoka seems to only speak to you in riddles while Abaki laughs along. The statements he spoke didn’t seem to make much sense to you, but you felt as if you had made new friends. In the end, Hisoka walked you home, while Abaki was brought back to their quarters by a police car. When he dropped you off in front of your house, he showed you a magic trick. A joker card seemingly disappearing into thin air. Later, you found the card wedged under the vegetables you had bought that day, and couldn’t help but giggle. He seemed like a nice person.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow I'm having doubts about changing the formatting now bc I'm too lazy to finish the actual backstory. oml.
> 
> I had half of this written before the backstory anyway, so yeaaaa.

“10 Participants have passed the fourth phase of the 287th hunter exam. #34 Ryu, #44 Hisoka, #53 Pokkle, #99 Killua, #294 Hanzo, #301 Gittarackur, #304 (Y/N), #403 Leorio, #404 Kurapika and #405 Gon. Now I have an announcement for all applicants. The chairman wishes to interview each of you. When your number is called, please come to the first reception room on the second floor. Then, we will start with number 44, Hisoka.”

You tense at the mention of his name. Your hands are clenched, and harshly against the wooden table they had been propped on. Under them, the table creaks, and your friends notice the tension surrounding you.

“Relax, (Y/N), I’m sure we’re all pretty scared of Hisoka.” Leorio jokes, patting the back of your hand.

“I’m sure she doesn’t need you to point that out.” Kurapika sighs

“Nah, it’s not that. My feelings towards him right now are…” You frown in contemplation, “Honestly, I don’t really understand them myself.”

“I know what you’re talking about!” Gon interjects with a mouthful of food, “You’re excited and nervous, it’s like feeling the complete opposite emotions!”

You snicker, “Yeah, the complete opposite emotions. I guess that’s pretty much it.”  

“Right?”

“Argh, but I don’t wanna think about him right now! Someone, distract me!” You whine and grab the shoulders of the nearest person, shaking them.

“Gon, why are we friends with this idiot?” Killua, who just happened to be the closest person, complains.

The bickering continues for the rest of your meal. In the background, applicants continue to be called on for their respective interviews.

“The next interview will be for #53, Pokkle.”

~

You are one of the last people to be called for an interview. The reception room is brightly lit with a traditional vibe. You take a seat at the table, opposite Netero. He has a calligraphy brush, and notepad in front of him.

“Now, I’ll be asking some questions to satisfy my own curiosity.”

“Sure,” You nod

“First, why do you want to become a hunter?”

“Because it will give me the freedom and resources to chase whatever I want.”

“I see, I see. Now, which of the other 9 applicants are you keeping an eye on?”

“Hmm, mainly Hisoka but Killua and Gon have become my close friends, too, as well as Leorio and Kurapika.”

“Which of the other eight applicants would you least want to fight?”

You pause, was he planning a duel? Was this a trick question or was he asking for real? This was your opportunity, so you shake off your pride.

“I don’t care about who I don’t fight but…” You bow your upper body, resting your forehead on the back of your hands. “I really want to fight, Hisoka. Please.”

Your eyes are shut, and cheeks red in embarrassment. You tremble slightly, in anticipation.

“Ah, what a strange one indeed.” The chairman laughs, “You’re the first to make such a request.”

You raise your head to peak at his reaction. He wears a joyous expression, one arm crossed against his chest while the other hand strokes his beard.

“So… Is that a yes?”

“Yes, yes, I will grant your wish.”

“Thank you!” You grin up at him enthusiastically.

He chuckles at your reaction.

“Well, go on then, I have one more person to interview.”

You quickly nod and leave the room, anticipating the oncoming fight.

~

It isn’t long before the airship lands. The continent around you is another forested area, and the clearing which had allowed for the airship to land was situated in the midst of circular structures, which resemble temples. These buildings consisted of a cylindrical or block-shaped base, with arches allowing entrance. Atop of these were large golden brick domes with pointed tips. Currently, all ten remaining examinees are all standing around the chairman, waiting for instructions for the last phase. According to the chairman, they are exotic hotels owned by the Hunter Exam Selection Committee, and completely booked for the remaining applicants for the duration of the final phase.

“Now, for the final phase, we will be holding one-on-one tournaments.” Netero explains.

A board covered with a cloth is pushed into the room. As soon as it comes to a halt, Netero pulls the cloth off. The unveiled panel displays what seems to resemble a knockout style tournament, branching from 10 to one, however the brackets were arranged such that some participants would have to participate in more fights than others. You frown at this unfair twist.

“So in other words, only the last person standing passes?” Leorio questions.

“No, one win is all that is necessary to pass.” Netero answers

“One win?” Gon echoes

“Then, in this tournament…”

“The winners are removed while the loser continues up the bracket.” Netero confirms the thought on everyone’s mind, “In other words, the person who finishes at the top will not pass. Does Everyone understand now?”

“So you’re saying that only one person will fail.” Hanzo repeats.

“Exactly. Now, here’s the bracket.”

With a rip, the material covering the names of the contestants is removed, unveiling the order of the oncoming battles. It is a pleasant surprise to see that you are one of the applicants with the most chances. The first bracket on your half is you against Kurapika. The loser would then move on to fight Hisoka, and then Ryu, and then Leorio. The other side of the bracket consisted of a battle between Gon and Hanzo, before moving on to Pokkle, Killua and finally Gitarakkur. You spare a glance at Kurapika who stands close by. He gives off his usual stoic but kind-hearted appearance, seemingly unaffected. You divert your gaze to the floor before speaking.

“Hey, Kurapika?”

“Yes?”

You hesitate slightly before stating your request, “Don’t forfeit just because we’re friends, okay?”

He dips his head in a single nod, chuckling.

“I wasn’t planning on it.”

~

The first match is between Gon and Hanzo. As soon as it begins, Gon dashes away from his opponent, but in a split second, he is knocked down with a chop to the back of his neck. He is shocked by the incomprehensible speed of his opponent, and the immediate reaction surprises even you.

“You did well for a kid.”

The ninja’s words resound in the otherwise silent room, and is soon followed by the thud of Gon’s body as it hits the floor. From next to you, Kurapika and Leorio’s shock is loud and clear. You hear Killua click his tongue, as if comparing his own abilities to that of Gon. You clench your fists, knowing Gon, he wouldn’t give up. Images of possible acts flash before your eyes. You could only pray that his opponent is a merciful person.

“Well, this would already be over if it were a normal fight.”

He reaches down to pull Gon into a sitting position, pressing a knee against the boy’s back.

“Here, wake up. You must feel terrible- your brain was probably bouncing around in your skull from my attack. Don’t you understand? You have no chance against me. You might as well give up now”

If only it were that easy. It wouldn’t take a genius to guess Gon’s answer.

“No way.” He forces out.

A harsh smack to the head, the collisions echoing through the hall. His vision must be swirling. Any normal child would be unconscious.

“Think about it, if you surrender now, you’ll still be in shape for your next fight. There’s no reason to be stubborn. Just surrender.”

“Never!”

Another hit. You feel your fingers twitch in anger. Your feet threatening to propel your body forward to help Gon, who is on his hands and knees in front of Hanzo.

“Surrender.”

Gon’s shaky limbs struggle to hold him up, and as soon as he is on his feet again, he is struck with a fist against his stomach.

“Gon! Don’t be silly! You’ll still have another chance!” Leorio belts, the sudden volume brings a ringing sensation to your ears.

“Leorio. If you were in Gon’s position, would you surrender?” Kurapika reasons

“Hell no, That guy thinks he’s so cool…”

“Then Gon feels the same way!”

“I know! I know that… But, there is no other choice!”

“You’re contradicting yourself, but I understand how you feel!”

A kick against his chest and his body flies across the room. He clutches his abdomen, quivering. As soon as he is almost up again, another attack forces him back to the floor. You’re struggling to keep your body in place, trembling in irritation.

“Fuck.” You curse, watching your precious friend struggling to get back onto his feet again.

The entire match could only be described as a completely one-sided beating. A flurry of merciless attacks, each dealt to convince the victim to surrender, but Gon never gave up. It went on for 3 hours. At some point, the palms of your hands had started bleeding from the force of your nails. Part of your anger was directed at Gon himself, possessing so much hope in such a situation. From the way you saw it, it would be impossible for him to win. It wasn’t endearing or inspiring, just an act of empty desperation, hoping for victory at the mercy of an opponent. Hanzo had also begun to grow impatient. He seizes Gon’s arms, pressing him against the floor from behind.

“Surrender. I will break your arm.”

“Never!”

The following cracking noise brought only rage to the pit of your stomach. Your muscles tense, and you can’t help the steps you take forward. The flesh right under your skin feels hot. The blistering sensation reminds you of that time against Pokkle on the island. A cold grip on your arm stops you amidst your actions. Killua’s hand. The sensation of cold skin calms your emotions.

“Thanks.” You offer, before diverting your eyes back to the match in front of you.

Hanzo had begun to explain his past, and how the match had already been decided.

“I’m trying to be nice. Admit defeat-“

His words are cut off by a kick to his face.

“Damn it, it hurts! My head’s cleared a bit, after all the pain and that long explanation.”

“Yes! Go Gon! Kick him while he’s down!” Leorio cheers

“If you’re eighteen, you’re only six years older than me. Besides, this isn’t a battle to see who’s stronger. It’s to see who’s willing to surrender first.”

Gon’s words seemed to have sliced through the tension which had filled the room before.

“I let you kick me on purpose. You don’t understand, this isn’t a warning, it’s an ultimatum. Was it too hard for you to understand? The I’ll make it easier for you.”

Hanzo slides his left hand across the bandages around his right wrist. A polished blade appears, following the motion of his fingers.

 “I’ll cut off your legs, so that they can’t be reattached. A permanent injury should help to wake you up. But first, I’ll ask you once more. Surrender.”

A pause, however the light atmosphere doesn’t seem to falter.

“I won’t accept that!” Gon asserts

Everyone’s reactions are blank, not knowing how to respond to Gon’s declaration. Hanzo stands there, scowling comically at the boy.

“I don’t want my legs cut off, but I don’t want to surrender. So let’s find a different way to fight!” Gon adds

“Oi, do you understand your own situation?!” Hanzo responds

You couldn’t help but giggle.

“You don’t get to make demands, are you trying to insult me?! I’m seriously going to cut off your legs!” Hanzo strains

“Even so, I won’t yield. Besides, if you do that, I’ll bleed to death. He’ll be disqualified if that happens, right?” Gon directs the question at the hunter behind Hanzo

“Uh, yes.” The suited man answers

“See? Neither of us wants that to happen. So let’s think of a better way.”

As soon as Gon takes control of the situation, the match is decided. Eventually, Hanzo gives up, knocking Gon out to force him into accepting the result. With that, the match was over and it was decided that Gon had earnt his hunters license. The next match is yours.

“(Y/N) versus Kurapika. Match start!”

As soon as the moderator announces the commencement of the match, you dash forward at top speed, delivering a blow in the direction of Kurapika’s stomach. His eyes widen at your speed, and barely manages to bring his arms down to block the blow. Next, you sweep your left leg around to kick the back of his knees. He sinks his body down, and blocks the attack with his shoulder. The force pushes him back, still in a position close to the ground. Immediately, you are behind him, bringing a hand down to chop the back of his neck. His reactions are just as fast, grabbing your arm and twisting it down so that your body followed. He throws a punch to your face, which you receive with the palm of your hand. You pull your wrist out of his grip, and retreat a few metres to assess his strengths and weaknesses.

“Your pretty strong.” Kurapika comments.

“As are you.” You respond

You note that he seems a lot more comfortable with attacking using his arms rather than his legs, which is natural for many fighters. You plan your next attacks to destabilise him. This time, however, he makes the first move. The movement catches you off guard, and you use both arms to block the punch aimed to your right side, leaving your left open. He takes this opportunity to strike your left torso. You tense your muscles to minimise the damage taken.

“Damn it.”

You skid back, ready to block his next attack. The rest of the match is extremely even. You each had landed a few hits on each other, enough to bruise, but not enough to hurt. It was only a few minutes before you are satisfied. You raise your arm with a smile.

“I surrender.”

Your heart hammers in your chest as you process the reality of your situation. The next match would be between you and Hisoka. Thinking about the impending contest, a tidal wave of varying feelings crashes through you. Excitement, fear, happiness, sorrow, hope, you could barely distinguish the cause of each emotion. Gon was right, they were the complete opposite of each other. What an overwhelming sensation.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> During which i spent the whole day watching circus videos, then half assing the actual description of the circus instead of writing the engineering report which i should be doing for uni.  
> Alas. The student life didn't choose me. T-T
> 
> I hope the names i made up on the spot sound moderately like decent names.

Stepping onto the wooden floor boards in the centre of the hall for that last exam against Hisoka was reminiscent of a day 7 years ago. A performance that had completely captivated you. Perhaps it was the first time that Hisoka had shown you his true nature. That very existence which entranced you into a churning void of curiosity and a yearning to learn more. Back then, it had dominated you, controlling the stage completely. You take a poised step forward, letting out a shaky breath and hoping all your nerves would escape with it.This time, you hope to be the one in control.

~

A few days had passed since the incident, but life went on as normal. As soon as you walk into the room, your mother is squealing, an envelope in her hand. You heave a sigh at her enthusiasm. This was probably another one of her family bonding missions, which she dubbed a ‘girls night out’ or something cringeworthy along those lines.

“(Y/N), (Y/N), I won 3 tickets on the radio today, it was a last moment give away and the show is tonight!”

“What’s it for?” You can barely muster a hint of excitement in your tone, not that it mattered to her.

“The Moritonio group, they’re performing at the Royal Glam Hotel. What a great bonding opportunity for us girls! And it’s two days before your birthday as well!”

You bring your palm to your forehead with a deadpan expression.

“Mom, that sounds like a mafia group or something. With my luck these last few days, we’re going to be shot the moment we enter or something.”

“Don’t make such crude jokes!” She chides with harsh finger movements.

“It’s barely even a joke.”

You rub your temples, not having mustered the courage to tell her about running into John Doe the other day. You decide that it would be better to omit that detail, and move on.

“But fine, I’ll tag along.” You add.

~

As the performance was to be held at an elaborate hotel, your mother had insisted on dressing the three of you up in equally as extravagant clothing. The tight black dress clings to your body uncomfortably, and the excessive beading and lace detail pricks your skin. You can’t help but to rub at the itchy patches the dress created. As you and your family ascend the stairs, you pull at your hair which had been curled up into an overly elegant bun. It didn’t suit you. Making your way over to the seats which had been designated to the three of you, you groan at the way your feet were held in the raised heels they had been forced into. The maroon colour of the leather matched that of the velvet plush chairs of the theatre in the most oddly unsatisfying manner. The lights dimmed after half an hour of your arrival. A stout man with a beard appears on stage with a microphone.

“Introducing, the Moritonio Troupe!”

With that he passes on the microphone to another man, his face is painted completely white, and he wears red and blue stripes.

“Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls! I am Raku from the Moritonio group!”

He hops onto a striped ball which is the same colour scheme as his shirt, and proceeds to bow.

“For the first main act, we will have Ms Ibara the contortionist!”

A woman clad in an iridescent silver leotard donned in a variety of rhinestones appears. She stretches her body out, before pushing it in an exaggerated bow, where here forehead presses against her knees. Instead of raising her body back up, she lowers her forearms to the ground, and flips her lower body over, doing a perfect split. Her jewelled costume sends the light dazzling in a million different directions. The position in the centre of the stage

“She will be supported by the trapeze artists, Ms Miano and Mr Uta”

A net is pulled taut across the stage seemingly out of nowhere, and two performers swing across the stage on their aerial apparatus. They do a flip on their own horizontal bar before swinging back, hanging upside down, and linking arms. In that position, they turn to the audience, and lower their heads before continuing their act.

“As well as our acrobats, Ms Abaki and Ms Komori”

You recognise the former, and cheer her name. The two women flip onto the stage, traversing the length of space in cartwheels and handstands. They seem to be glowing under the luminescent lights illuminating the stage. You beam at the amazing display.

“Our next act will be Mr Borizoi, the animal tamer!”

A round, bald man with three stripes tattooed across his head steps onto the stage. Behind him is a woman riding an elephant. The man waves a long prod around himself, before positioning it in front of the elephant. The animal begins to follow the movements, trotting around the stage. When it makes the first round, a unicyclist emerges below the stage, riding in sync with the creature’s movements. The rider rises from her seated position. She raises one leg above her head and twirls around once with the other. The man below changes his directions and the animal speeds up while the woman dances. The lights change colour, and shadows of butterflies and blooming buds appear on the backdrop. The music fades into one more tropical and elegant. You are entranced. Shades of yellow flitter against your lashes, under your eyelids, adding to the red which refused to fade. The vibrant hues brush against your heartstrings with each passing act. The bright colour is tinged a different tone with each portrayal of the jubilant performances that is the circus. The excitement has you on the edge of your seat, gripping on as if to prevent yourself from being blown away. Act after act after act.

“And to conclude our show, here is the infamous Moritonio with his sky swimming act!” The short man balancing on the ball announces.

The lighting changes, as if to signify the start of the act. The spotlights focus on the centre of the stage but there is no one there. The people around you begin to complain at this mistake.

“What’s the hold up?”

“Hurry up!”

A few seconds of delay and confusion passes before the lights go black. This only increases the volume of the uproar. You don’t understand their complaints; the rest had been so enthralling. Why were they so fussed over a tiny pause in momentum?

“How unpleasant.”

You freeze at the sound of the familiar voice. Amber eyes that you had become accustomed to seem to burn as they bear through you. As he speaks, his attention seems to be focused primarily on you.

*Hisoka’s voice, he is staring right at you”

“There have been some mishaps over the past few days, and unfortunately our Sky Swimming act has been cancelled. ♠”

A murmur of complaints spread through the audience.

“But I’ve conjured a trick on my own which I hope will be of the same calibre ♣”

The lights turn on, and the stage is visibly different. Tiny red flower petals rain from above, cards floating at different heights, spinning evenly around the stage. As soon as the two come in contact. The fragile magenta would splay evenly into two halves before disintegrating into what appeared to be glitter. The ground is covered in this deep shade of red which glistens and flows as if a pool. Hisoka stands at centre stage with his arms outstretched. Was it just your imagination or is his stare fixed right onto you?

“Now, the evil magician would like to host a pop quiz…” He points to the ceiling, sending a playing card flying in that direction. “Who is that man?”

From the roof, a man stands upside down, his body is cloaked in a large black coat, and the red petals seem to be falling from his form.

“That’s Moritonio!” You hear someone call, voice laced with evident excitement.

“Correct.”

You hear chatter erupt around you.

“So the act wasn’t cancelled, and only revamped.”

“Wow, he’s pretty much performing his sky swimming right now.”

“Quick take some photos! We need to update the information as quickly as possible on our blog!”

The hushed whispers and interrupted by a flurry of cards which fly in the direction of Moritonio.

“Now the next question is, who is he now? ♣”

They briefly cover the man’s figure before bouncing off his body and floating down gracefully. You instantly realise that the face of the man has changed as well, now donning a mask which you recognise. The audience around you seemed extremely confused and a stagnant silence fills the performance theatre.

“John Doe.”

Your voice is louder than you had intended, however you didn’t think that it would be heard by Hisoka. Perhaps he had read it off the movement of your lips.

“Correct. ♦”

Another tremor of discussion runs through the audience as they begin to talk about the identity of the fore-mentioned man.

“My, what a smart girl. Why don’t you come up here and answer the next question too? ♥”

His index finger turns to your direction, and instantly you are pulled towards him. You squeal when your body lurches forward with enough force to wrench your entire mass into the air. The audience stares on in awe, complimenting the 'trick' as you are sent flying over them onto the stage. He flicks his arm upwards, and instantly, you feel the force which had been pulling you redirect towards the roof. You stumble to a stop in front of him.

“So this man is Moritonio and John Doe. How is this possible?”

The first thing you notice as you take a cautious step backwards is the sickly viscosity of the floor. You also realise that the cards in your trajectory had dropped into the red substance below. It was a liquid, which spilled over the plastic patterned backing of the prop. Without answering, you touch the nearest card which is still spinning, wincing when it created a small cut on your finger. The edges of Hisoka’s lips turn upwards into a cruel smirk. A tiny droplet of scarlet, which is only visible to you and Hisoka, spills to the floor. As soon as the liquid makes contact with the red substance on the floor, it dawns on you. It was as if your senses had been dulled until that moment, and suddenly the rusty scent of blood overwhelmed you. The sheer amount made you gag, doubling over, not wanting to touch the substance any more than you already had. Hisoka feints a shocked reaction.

“Oh dear, stage fright? ♣”

You hear a squelching sound above you as the man is made to walk backwards.

“What a shame. Then I’ll leave it to our friend to close the show as usual.”

One of the man’s arms stretches outwards, another moving to his back. Hisoka pulls you back towards the curtains. From the shaded area, you notice that the movements of his hands seem to orchestrate the walking motions made by the man in the sky. He motions for the figure to walk back and seemingly float to the floor of the stage before the show comes to a close. The lights return to normal and the front curtains close. Your nausea calms after you wipe the bottoms of your shoes on the greying carpet in the closed off area, which is suspiciously empty.

“You killed him?” You question in a tone full of curiosity more than anything else.

“Do you want to find out with your own eyes? ”

“Maybe." You muse, but your eyes are full of want, "My mum will get worried if I stay for that long.”

“What a shame. I was looking forward to your reaction.”

You pause, eyeing the twisted expression he is wearing. You speak without a second thought of reason.

“Show me tomorrow.” You request, “I’ll meet you under the bridge at the outskirts of town.”

“And here I was planning to leave this town tomorrow.”

“I thought there was another performance in 2 days?”

“I’ve already drawn the cards I need here. Although…” You feel his grip constrict around your arm, tight enough to leave a bruise, “…There is still one more that I want. ♥”

~

Your heels dig into the wood, and position your body side on from him. You bend your knee slightly, which are shoulder width apart. You let your arms tense loosely at your side. You take a deep intake of breath, and let adrenaline fill your veins. Your concentration is focused on your centre of mass. The two of you stand face to face, one life to another.

“(Y/N) versus Hisoka, match start!”


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes hello it is me again.  
> Back with another chapter  
> And temptation to write another story hahahah-  
> Right before a pile of assignments are due hahahhaha-  
> And with exams incoming hahahahhahahahahh--  
> Why is life like this send help S.O.S T-T  
> I should stop using the authors note to whine about my life ok bye

As soon as the match begins, you charge in his direction with your fist pulled back. You feint an attack to his face, and dash behind him to aim a punch at the base of his spine. Before your fist can make contact, a painful force against your stomach forces your body backwards. You land a few feet away from him in a defensive crouch. His speed startles you, the kick had been so immediate that it should barely be possible even if he saw through your feint. Startled, you leap backwards, bounding to the edge of the room. You rest a foot at the base of the wall, ready to propel yourself against the surface to the other side of the hall at any moment. Your concentration is on Hisoka, who hadn’t moved an inch, but his interest seems to have perked. You briefly notice a sensation of warmth covering your forearms and lower legs, but you attribute it to production of hormones in reaction to the fight. His pupils shift to focus on your limbs.

“Oh? Maybe you are worthy enough to become my toy after all.”

His words ignite a flush in your cheeks, and your heart speeds up at the praise, but you keep your attention directed on his body. He makes no effort to hide his movements, a hand on his waist as he gazes at you in a manner of lecherous excitement.

“I’ve never fought someone in such a state before. I’ll have to keep you around to see how you mature.” He hums.

From his posture, he seems to have no intention to attack you. He’s forcing you to make the first move. With mixed feelings, your only option is to attack. In an instant, you change the position of your propelling leg, thrusting your weight to a wall on your left. You are surprised at how much force you pushed off the floor with, travelling a lot higher and further than you had anticipated. You use this momentum to spring off the wall in Hisoka’s direction, noticing that he had not moved since the beginning of the exam. If he was planning to fight you in the same spot, you determine to make him regret it. His lack of reaction at your approach confuses you, as you had decided your attacks in relation to predicted responses. Your eyes narrow, in suspicion, and decide to play it safe. You aim a kick at his lower body while blocking your vital body parts with your arms. Surely enough, the two of you trade blows. Your kick would probably bruise his hip, however when you land on your feet again, a few metres away from him, you feel blood dripping down your forearm. You are surprised, not having seen him pull out any weapon at all. In front of you, he is now shuffling a deck of cards, and blood drips down one end of the deck.

“What a smart girl. You could have sustained a horrible injury there if you weren’t. ♥”

You ignore the jest, dashing towards him again. This time you pull out the dagger beneath your waistband. If he is using weapons then so are you. As he extends his arms, you swipe your knife across the length of his playing cards. A malicious grin spreads across his face at your actions, sending a shiver down your spine. Something is wrong. You try to retract your dagger, but you made your decision too late. There is a clink of metal falling against the floor, and you realise your new weapon had been sliced cleanly in half. Your eyes widen, and for a second, you stand there, dazed. Paper cutting through steel? You must be dreaming, right?

“Now, I have a question for you. A pop quiz, if you may.”

His voice is low, coated with a fake sweetness. It resembles a poisonous candy. His arm rests against your shoulder, and a card lies against your neck.

“And if I refuse?”

“You should already know the answer to that.”

The card presses harder against your skin, creating a shallow scratch. A small amount of blood pools on top of the playing card- a four of hearts. You let out an exasperated chuckle, the weakest card. He even had the time to pick out a number and suit to send the message. He leans into you and lowers his head such that you can practically feel the vibrations of his voice behind you.

“If scissors beats paper, how did I cut through your blade?”

You close your eyes, concentrating on the entity of your body. Wisps of hot steam are licking at your wrists and ankles. You grasp onto those fervent traces of sweltering energy, tugging it forward.

_I want to beat Hisoka._

Your thoughts are definitive, declaring your intention firmly. The intense heat engulfs your body, scorching your flesh like white fire.

“Correct. ♦”

Hisoka’s voice is that of a predator, as if he could see the feverish atmosphere that had formed around your body. A thin fog of worry clouds your mind as your consciousness slips away.

~

A thick viscous liquid surround your body, and faint traces of light shine through the substance from above. It is a strange feeling to be so aware of your own oblivion. Such an unfamiliar feeling of an unexplored area. You stretch our your legs to manoeuvre your body around. Large bubbles cluster around you, and span as far as you can see. You approach them in a manner which resembles swimming. Inside each bubble is a memory, seeming to be categorised into time and emotion.

As you pass by each translucent sphere, a warm scarlet catches your attention. Your current opponent. Seeing a play through of your moments all those years ago is nostalgic. The weeks which seemed to pass so quickly. That's right, he had left exactly a month after your first meeting. It was a wonder he had managed to change your outlook in such a way. Are you grateful? Are you angry? It's hard to tell.

~

You are forced back to the real world by an intense pain around your neck. You can’t breath. Your fingers are clawing at the hand that squeezes your throat. Your trachea feels like it’s about to burst, and blurry circles appear in your vision. Tears form in the corner of your eyes from the pressure. You can feel a bruise forming on the base of your neck as a you are jolted backwards against the floor. Your entire body aches, and you can feel cuts and bruises spread on every inch of your skin. An extremely persistent throbbing pulses through your left wrist, indicating that it is probably broken. Above you, fiery red and pale white blur together. You are on the verge of falling back into an abyssal darkness. Your lips part, trying to force out coherent words of surrender.

“I- I-“ You can barely gasp out the syllable under the immense force around your windpipe.

“Ah, you’re back.” Hisoka chimes.

You feel the pressure against your neck shift. The influx of oxygen in your lungs allows your vision to focus on his form, but his hand now covers your mouth, muffling your attempt to speak. You can only glare at him defiantly.

“I must say, I’m quite surprised you aren’t able to see your own aura even though you are using it.” He muses, tapping a finger against his jaw.

“What do you mean? Stop talking gibberish!” You want to demand, however this attempt is subverted by the palm forcing your lips closed.

“Oh? Don’t worry. You put up a fight.”

His tone rises in amusement, teasing you with his next words.

“You landed an entire punch. But don’t worry, it won’t leave a mark.”

His eyes run down the length of your abdomen, from your neck down to your hips, where his knee keeps you firmly backed on the ground.

“Although I can’t say the same about you~ ♣”

You raise your right arm to smack him across his face, but before you can even initiate the movement, he grips your limb.

“Oh? If you want this wrist broken too, you only have to ask.”

A sardonic grin spreads across his face, and you feel a painful pressure spreading across your forearm. You attempt to pull your wrist away, and he releases his grip.

“Either way. I’m interested to see what you can learn in the next few months. You better not disappoint me again, (Y/N).”

He pulls his hand away from your face, raising it and staring at the hunter overlooking the match.

“I surrender.” He states in a nonchalant tone.

Shaken up, you try to put off thinking about the fight. You were almost there, you could ask your teacher about everything that had happened. He’d definitely have an answer. Everything will be revealed to you as soon as you get off the airship to his continent. You try to calm yourself, yet still find yourself fidgeting with the hem of your shirt.

As you shuffle back to your friends, you see Killua with knitted brows. His eyes dart from you to Hisoka, and then from Gon to Hanzo. You can’t help the melancholy smile that begins to form.

“You’re wondering why the stronger one surrendered in both these matches, aren’t you?” You ask Killua in a quiet voice

He hesitates for a second before making a sound of affirmation.

“Honestly, I’m wondering the same thing. The world works in strange ways.”

You try to be as reassuring as possible, reaching out to place a comforting hand on his shoulder, but as soon as you make contact, you flinch backwards. It felt as if a needle had pricked you, yet at the same time, the pain hadn’t felt tangible. It didn’t feel like he was the source of the stinging sensation.

“Killua…. Why is there a needle in your forehead?” You speak automatically before you realise what had happened.

His attention snaps to you, and he stabs his sharpened fingers into the skin between his eyebrows. Sure enough, a thin glimmering sliver of metal is held between his thumb and forefinger.

“My brother’s needle.” He breaths. “How did you-“

An aura of bloodlust cuts him off, and you notice the shiver that racks his frame. The empty eyes of Gitarakkur are bearing directly at you, his head rattles, and the needles imbedded in his flesh quiver. The murderous intent, however, fades as soon as it had appeared, and he turns to face forward again.

“Older brother.” Killua’s voice is cold, and as are his eyes.

The sudden change in his demeaner is obvious, and draws the attention of even Kurapika and Leorio. Was he planning to fight Illumi with the same intent you had previously possessed in fighting Hisoka? Ah, the joys of lifelong debacles.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my genuine feelings right now: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
> 
> thank you for listening, please enjoy the chapter which I was slightly lazy with.

It had been such a long time since someone besides your family had paid such genuine attention to you. He always smiled and listened as you spoke, giving thoughtful responses each time. You found yourself growing closer to him in an innocent, childish stupor. Over the last 2 weeks, you had hoarded his time. Over this period, he had also disassociated himself with the travelling circus, and altered his dressing style to normal t-shirts and jeans. With a black cap covering his uniquely coloured hair, he blended right in.

The two of you are seated on a bench stationed at a sidewalk near your house. You are currently ranting about the situation with your friend, Ari. At first, you had been incredulously angry, but now you begin to feel the tiniest amount of sympathy for her, as if deep streaks of blue dotting your emotions and perception of the world.

“I thought we were best friends, and yet she still goes running to someone she said she hated so much! And I feel so betrayed! And yet, I kind of want to talk to her again." You ramble, with a frown.

Hisoka hums, biding his time to formulates his response. Would his decision be important? He didn't know, but perhaps it was an opportunity to amuse himself for a while, and when that time comes to a close, he'd have you find him and entertain him when you grow stronger. What impact would his words have on you? Depending on the outcome, it could shape the way you view friendship for a while. Which would impact on your desire to seek him out, and the subsequent opinion you have about him. What a tough call.

"So why don't you ask her about it? It must be an awful pain to carry someone else's ill opinions for them." He muses, flipping a card between his fingers. "You began to hate him due to her complaints, did you not?"

"Yeah, but I don't want to be the one who approaches her. I want her to apologise to me first." You huff.

Hisoka chuckles at the petty nature of your conversation, and briefly compares this to the one he had with Moritonio a few days prior. They had both began in such a lighthearted manner. A passing thought addresses how easily he can kill you.

"Don't be so full of pride, it might get you killed one day." The last remark is his final comment made about the man who had told him about Nen, before he leaves all memory of the event behind. 

"I'm not. I'd just feel like a soft-hearted idiot if I approach her that easily." You whine, pouting.

"But you want to, do you not? Perhaps soft-hearted idiot is a fitting description." He teases.

"Maybe you're right." You surrender, slouching against the hard wooden back of the chair. You cross your arm stubbornly. "I guess I'll go talk to her... But I'll definitely not apologise."

"Let's go now." Hisoka announces, definitely something you hadn't expected. "I'll even tag along."

You immediately flush a bright shade of rose and raise your voice in protest. "No! What if she thinks we're a couple or something!"

"But (Y/N), you've already confessed to me. ♥" His sly voice is all too close for your liking, followed by a gentle caress of your jawline.

"I-I-" You slap his hand away. "That was because of the atmosphere and all. It wasn't-"

Light laughter bubbles from his throat, and he stands up. He begins to pull you along into a fast walking pace down the sidewalk.

"You can't take back your words now. Her house is next to yours, is it not?"

You quickly realise where he is taking you, and the jitters of nerves set in. You begin to regret your original declaration of speaking with Ari. Hisoka can feel the halfhearted tugging of your hand, but continues to pull you along. You can't take your words back now. The spots of blue spread across your world had turned into a cerulean sea by the time you reach the all too familiar front lawn of your previous friend. You take a deep breath, opening the small metal gate to her garden. You grab Hisoka's hand, tugging him along the well maintained brick path.

"How straight forward for a girl who had been stammering such a short while ago." He comments.

Your grip tightens, hoping to bruise the smug magician. Or at the very least, get your point across for him to stop talking.

You tap the wooden door a few times, and seconds after, it opens. It creaks open, revealing Ari's figure. You hesitate, not knowing what to say. Your grip on Hisoka's hands falter, and you bow your head in panic.

"Ari. I'm sorry. I haven't been seeing from your perspective at all."

Hisoka's amused gaze is trained on you. This had gone better than he had hoped.

"No. It's my fault. I shouldn't have dragged you through a field of personal thoughts and back." The other girl replies heavily after a short pause.

“But, I should have been more understanding. Will you forgive me?”

You are pulled into a tight hug. “Of course I will.”

It was needless to say that the red-haired jester was completely ignored in the ensuing conversation between the two of you. From the sidelines, he shuffles the deck of cards he always keeps with him, waiting for the opportunity to steal you away again. 

~

A small cliffside by a shore in your town is a hidden gem that tourists often miss. Not a single other person is to be seen at the location, besides you and Hisoka. The ocean breeze combs through your hair, a relaxing sensation.

"I'm leaving today." Hisoka reveals in a tone softer than his usual high strung one.

A few blinks are followed by a disappointed "Oh."

"That's all? I would've thought you to be more dramatic."

"I knew it was coming." You sigh, "Is this the part where you disappear and leave me with a card that's meant to symbolise something?"

“Perhaps. You’ll just have to wait and see.”

You frown. “But I don’t want to.”

“Too bad.” He chimes.

There is a short lull in your conversation, but the silence is comfortable. The two of you stare off into the ocean, contemplating the future.

"And what do you want to do now?" He enquires.

You let out a hefty breath before you announce your decision. "I'm going to get stronger. I'll train and do what I feel like, and then I'll find you and give you the punch in the face that I'm not strong enough to deliver right now. You know, Hisoka, I still have a grudge from that first time we met. I still feel as if there's something that needs to be done. As if my actions back then weren't enough. I'm going to find what's missing, and then I'll make you fight me."

"Make me fight you?" Hisoka echoes, "I don't think that'll be necessary."

A gleeful grin extends across the magicians features. His lips spread perversely into a genuine mirror of how he truly feels at that moment. His eyes narrow into impassioned slits which rake your form up and down. His wet tongue darts across his lower lip as if a predator, eyeing his prey in anticipation. Bloodlust pulsates from his form in waves. The usual sly facade crumbles, revealing the carnal desire laying in wait underneath.

"I'm looking forward too it. ♦" His voice comes out a breathy groan.

You would have probably dubbed the display as extremely creepy, if it weren't for the fact that you are completely entranced. As soon as your had proclaimed your own plans, it was as if the hues of reds, yellows and blues, which had made themselves present in your world over the last few days, are dancing together. The flutter left and right, rippling as they swirl in a combination of all three colours. It brought a new clarity to your emotions and actions. You feel alive, as if your world had figuratively been painted in colour.

"Likewise." You whisper.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaah sorry for the wait- I had a pile of stuff due on Monday and after that I kinda just collapsed and became lazy for a while. I actually had this chapter sitting there for the past week, but hesitated in posting it and eventually forgot. Whoops. The reason was because it felt like a really disjointed chapter since i wrote it in sections and not at once so the flow is probably obviously off. I never really went back to fix it. I even updated my other story before this one T-T aaaaaa Im so lazy sorry
> 
> Also, just a quick heads up (that I should have done before) Ryu is actually Bodoro’s target in canon, but since I made reader beat Bodoro up in the 4th phase, I kinda just replaced him with his target in the rest of the exam. ‘-‘; but yeah, it’s pretty unimportant either way. Just wanted to clarify.

You are surprised when none of them ask about what had happened during the fight, you were entirely sure that Killua and Kurapika had noticed. Perhaps Killua had already linked it to what you informed him of at the previous stage. You could however, feel Kurapika’s inquisitive eyes on your back, which you tried to brush off. One of the many men in suits bandages your broken wrist, and hands you a disinfectant to rub over your lacerations.

The next fight is Killua’s first match, which he surrenders immediately. His eyes are set on the disconcerting body of Gittarackur with a tight jaw. After is basically a one-sided beating of Ryu, which did not last long. Perhaps it is fear which convinces the swordsman to surrender to the magician seconds after the match begins. The subsequent match is between Killua and Gittarackur. The idea made you worry about the young assassin. Not only did the green clad man give off a terribly intimidating appearance, the sinister atmosphere radiating from him was incredibly consistent.

“Killu. It’s been a while.” The man’s voice is a monotone, as he greets the boy, pulling out the needles in his face when the two stand face to face in the middle of the hall.

At first, Killua seems confident, with his hands in his pockets. The transformation Illumi had gone through didn’t change his demeaner.

“Killu.” He says again, this time in his real voice which turns out to be velvety and deep, “Mother misses you.”

Killua doesn’t reply, so Illumi reaches his hand out, palm facing Killua. Instinctively, the younger dashes backwards. It is visible that even from this range, whatever Illumi was doing had an effect. The blank and seemingly bottomless black eyes which belonged to the black hair male cut right to Killua.

“Mother and I want you to come back. You’re an assassin.” Illumi’s voice is smooth and hypnotic, bending his joints such that his index and middle finger were pointing in Killua’s direction.

The latter trembles slightly, but his eyes are still defiant. “I don’t want to be an assassin anymore. I’ve made friends in this world, and I plan to keep it that way.”

Illumi’s head tilts slightly to the right. With the flick of his wrist, a needle is sent in Killua’s direction. He dodges the first projectile, however in his shocked state, the succeeding attack of pointed metal is enough to ensure that at least one lodges in his skin.

“Assassin’s don’t need friends, Killu.”

The white-haired assassin tries his best to resist the influence of the other Zoldyck. His knees wobble beneath him, sending tremors up his body.

“I- I don’t want to b- be an assassin” He grinds out, as the shine in his eyes fade.

You didn’t realise how strained your hands were until you felt wooden splinters pierce the tips of your fingers, as flooring gave way under the intense force you exerted. Your good arm propels yourself forward, towards the fight.

“Killua!” You shout, balling towards the two with your arms flailing in a panic.

Two suited men come out to block your path, but you are extremely close to siblings. By now, you have realised that the warmth around your body isn’t just some fluke, so you reach out your hand with your best attempt to reach Killua with the heat. You aren’t completely sure where the intangible mess had stopped, but it seemed to snap Killua out of the trance he had been put in. You feel another wave of unimaginably horrific terror wash over you, but you don’t let it change your actions.

“Killua! Don’t you dare let your stupid imitation pincushion of a brother get into your mind, you hear me? I’ll beat you up if you do, and then Gon will too!”

The blank dread on the boy’s face seems to have ebbed away, and he stabs two fingers into his arm, chest and jaw to dig out the needles which had hit him. You are pleased at this effect until you see the murderous intent in his eldest brother’s eyes.

“After I obtain my license… I’m allowed to murder anyone I want, is that right?” Illumi questions, staring directly at you.

“Yes… That is correct…” The man next to him replies hesitantly.

“In that case. I surrender.”

He looks down at Killua with his inattentive eyes.

“After this, I’ll just have to kill Gon, and you’ll come home, right, Killu?” He assesses you, “Or does she have to die too?”

Despite the ominous nature of his proclamation, his voice is light, as if it were just another conversation about the weather. Killua’s eyes are a picture of silent fury, and so were yours.

“Go ahead and try what you want. You’re not going to get very far. I can guarantee you that.” He all but growls.

Illumi, on the other hand, absentmindedly brandishes two needles, and rolls his wrist. In one quick movement, the two pins are thrown in the direction of two men on either side of the hall. One for Ryu, and one for Leorio. Leorio swiftly moves to the side with a yelp, and the pointed tip barely manages to tear a hole in his shirt. However, the swordsman wasn’t as lucky. The sliver of metal pieces his shoulder, and instantly his eyes are vacant.

“…I surrender the next two rounds” Ryu’s voice barely contained a hint of life.

As soon as he uttered those words, Illumi was at his figure, pulling out the needle with incredible haste. You can feel your anger bubbling up, threatening to erupt at the callous opinion the man held for human life. The only thing that keeps you from attacking is the image of his strength. You can’t beat him. You need to become stronger.

“So it’s decided, yes?”

“Well… Yes…”

“And I can have my license now?”

“No, we will hand those to each successful applicant after the briefing ceremony.”

The black hair assassin turns to you. “I guess you have that much longer to live.”

You want to curse back at him, and slam his face against the floor, but you maintain your composure.

“We’ll see.”

As you are being led to what was said to be an auditorium, Hisoka tugs on your arm, pulling you back. He waits until every other person is out of view.

“You’ve changed. You seem more lost than before. I can’t tell whether I like it or not. ♠”

Hisoka’s voice held a melancholy tone which you haven’t heard for a very long time. You can’t deny that the attentive nature behind said tone makes your heart skip a beat, however his choice of words irritate you.

“More lost?” You frown, turning to face him square on. “No way, I’ve spent the last few years travelling all over the world to find what I want, thank you very much. Just because we met again accidentally doesn’t give you the right to reminisce, or imagine yourself as someone important to me.”

“You mean to say you haven’t been looking for me?”

“Nope” You lie, popping the ‘p’ sound.

“I’m hurt.” Hisoka easily sees through your reply, noting the way you clutch the side of your shorts, and shift your jaw.

“Good. Now did you have a reason for pulling me over?”

“Well that depends. I’d prefer for you to live, for now.”

You frown. “Not long ago, you threatened to kill me. And seriously, I know you were going to follow through on that. What changed?”

“I’m a fickle person. Just as treasure can turn to trash in an instant, the opposite can also be said.”

You bite the inside of your cheek, the comment striking a chord. How long had he been thinking about you as trash? And after all the work you had put in?

“I don’t need your help.” You turn around to leave, however the magician has other plans.

“(Y/N), let me tell you a thing or two.”

A whir in the air signifies a card flying towards you. You dodge, but it still manages to slice a strand of hair. You snatch the card, a joker.

“What’s your probl-“

You are cut off as an invisible force yanks you towards him. No matter how hard you try, you are unable to free yourself. Catching you off balance, he wraps his arms around you, and you feel a strange warmth envelope your upper limbs. When you try to move them to push him away, you find that they are bound together.

“What do you call something that is right in front of your eyes, but you cannot see?”

“Let me go!”

“Incorrect.”

He snatches the card he had thrown at you, tracing the form of your shoulder with the sharpened edge before slipping it into your pocket.

“Now you owe me 3 jokers.” He grins, “And if you don’t pay it off, the debt collector may be the grim reaper. ♥”

Without another word, he makes his way back along the stone path. You reluctantly trudge along behind him, arms still tangled in an imperceptible substance. On the plus side, at least he hadn’t tried to kill you.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about my updates spacing out further apart orz. I'm in the middle of my exam period right now so I probably wont' get around to updating this story until the end of my exams.   
> Next update's probs gonna be around 19th ish unless I write sth during my exams to destress. ~u~

The conference held to deliver each hunter their license went by extremely awkwardly for you. With both your arms bound together with some invisible substance, you sat in an uncomfortable position, with your arms pulled straight against each other, resting on the table before you. Throughout the whole lecture given by Beans and Netero, you stole wary glances at both Illumi and Hisoka. Over time, it had dawned on you that if Hisoka was offering any form of assistance, then you would probably need it. He does seem to know the long-haired assassin better than you. And what is this joker card debt all about? Is he forcing his assistance upon you for you to return the favour?

_That shitty clown._

When the ceremony ends, you can feel Illumi’s eyes on both you and Gon. His intent on murder is clear. Sneaking a glimpse back at him, you shiver. You immediately regret challenging him.

_We’ll see about that._

Your own words strike shards of doubt through your body. Your chest rises in a deep intake of breath and you reassess the situation; being the legal adult, and probably the oldest out of the group of you, it is your responsibility to take control. Resolve fills your eyes, and you make sure that it is obvious in your appearance.

As you turn to face Illumi, a glisten of refined metal races towards you. You hadn’t expected him to attack so immediately, but on instinct, you raise your arms to block vital areas of your body. You brace yourself for the pain of the needles imbedding themselves into your arms, however it never comes. Instead, the fine silvery shards float millimetres away from your skin, as if trapped in an unseen substance.

_Hisoka_

Your eyes dart to the red-haired jester the same moment as Illumi’s, the Zoldyck not caring to hide his unamused expression.

“Is this another one of your jokes, Hisoka?” His voice holds a subtle undertone of malice.

“Of course not, dear Illumi. There are people that I hold dear too~” Hisoka’s declaration is almost a warning, a threatening edge in the manner he articulates his words.

“This vulgar woman? And here, I thought I was being generous sparing that other boy. Gon.” Illumi states dismissively.

The invisible force around your arms are released. Light clinking sounds echo at your feet as Illumi’s needles also fall to the floor.

“There are always other opportunities.”

“You’re right. I’m sure you’ll be done playing soon enough.” Illumi turns to you.

Hisoka turns to you with a broad smile. “Off you run, little flower.”

You frown, not sure whether to be offended or relieved. You teeter between wanting to argue back, and leaving without another word. The latter is the better choice, you decide. If you were alone, your choice may have been different, but with the children behind you, you wouldn’t want to risk anything.

~

Kurapika and Leorio both sigh in relief as when the five of you walk off the airship. Killua and Gon stretch their arms in the freedom of the empty space outside.

“That sure was an experience.” Kurapika notes, lowering himself onto a bench, “So what are we planning to do next?”

“How about some rest!” Gon pipes.

His suggestion is immediately followed by a loud smack on the head from Killua.

“Idiot, didn’t you say you were going to punch Hisoka across the face?” He scolds.

“Yeah what about it?” Gon’s response only prompts a burdened sigh from the other.

You can’t help but laugh at the argument between the two.

“I think his point is that you should be training. You won’t be able to land a finger on Hisoka in the state you are right now.” You suggest, lightly.

“Oh! You’re right!” The boy’s eyes light up in realisation, as if it hadn’t occurred to him before.

“Speaking of Hisoka.” Kurapika’s eyes are stern yet sympathetic as he turns to you, “I think (Y/N) should explain herself.”

“That’s right! You became really strong all of a sudden during your fight! You even managed to hit him a couple of times! I’m sure (Y/N) can help me train!” Gon agrees, enthusiastically.

“Huh? Oh- I-“ You’re not sure how to continue, and you look to Killua for help. The silverette only diverts his gaze, pretending to whistle. Your eyes narrow playfully at his attitude before looking back to the blonde. “I’m not sure how to, honestly. Theres a tonne of things I don’t get yet, so I was planning to ask my master.”

“What do you mean?” Kurapika probes.

“Well, the strength thing. I’m barely aware of myself when I’m doing it. My whole body feels hot and then it’s as if my consciousness burns away too. I don’t really know how else to word it.”

“No, I wasn’t talking about that.” He sighs, “You seemed extremely disorientated after the fight, and your eyes were closed the whole time. I sort of figured you wouldn’t be able to explain it. Actually, I was talking about your relationship with him.”

His choice of wording immediately incites a misunderstanding. “Re-relationship?” You repeat, cheeks rapidly burning up.

“Yes, how you two know each other.”

The clarification only embarrasses you more.

“How I know him? Well… I guess he’s my childhood friend?” Your words are more of a question, nevertheless, a shock to your company.

“Huh?!” The four of them are dumbfounded.

“You knew that psycho when he was a child??” Killua gawks, “And here I thought I had a dark past.”

“Oh, no no, I knew him when I was 10. He was already my age when we met.” You explain.

“When you were 10? How are you still alive? Did he do anything weird to you? Oh man.” Leorio rambles.

You shake your head and wave your hands in front of you. “Nah, he wasn’t bad back then. He saved my life a few time, even. This is probably the third time-“

Your eyes widen in realisation.

‘ _Now you own me 3 jokers.’_

“The third time he’s saved me.” You continue, voice softening.

“Saved you?” Leorio doesn’t take note of your subdued tone, shouting right in your face. “That idiot probably wants to kill us all eventually. Saved you my ass.”

“He’s giving us a chance though, if we get stronger, then we can fight against him, right?” You shrug, and Leorio grinds his teeth at your response.

“So, for now we get stronger.” Kurapika concludes, with a gentle smile.

“Let’s find a chance to meet up again.” Gon suggests.

“Oh- that’s right.” The blond Kurta rummages the pockets of his white training garments, pulling out a card with a distinct backing pattern. The thin board is noticeably crumpled, and there is a spider in place of it’s suit. The arachnid has a number 4 marked in the centre of it’s abdomen. “I found this during the briefing. There was a note over the top, but strangely enough it’s disappeared. ‘I shall await you in Yorknew city on Semptember 1st’ or so it said.”

“September 1st?” Leorio repeats thoughtfully

“Then you still have half a year.” Gon states. “What’s going to happen there?”

“Oh!” The older teen clicks his finger in realisation, “They’ll hold the world’s largest auction.”

“That’s right.” Kurapika affirms. “September 1st through to September 10th. An auction for unusual items, rare goods, and national treasures from around the world. It attracts all sorts of nasty folks looking to satisfy their own greed. The biggest gathering of money in the world.”

“And the troupe will be there?”

“They’re a group of bandits. They won’t let this chance escape. And so, on that day, Hisoka will be somewhere in Yorknew City.”

“I see. The 1st of September.”

“And that’s the next time we’ll meet?” You ponder.

“It seems like it.” Kurapika nods

“Oh, I know!” You perk up, “Let’s have a competition.”

“What sort?” Gon asks.

You grin. “Let’s see who can improve the most in that period of time.”

“You’re on.” Killua accepts with devious enthusiasm.

“I’m in!” Gon raises his hand, beaming.

“I guess I have no choice.” Kurapika chuckles.

“Gosh. You bunch are seriously too much.” Leorio complains, rubbing the front of his head.

“I can’t wait to crush you all!” You cheer.

The group laugh together for a final time. A chorus of genuine happiness which ripples through the emptying grounds. Despite your travels, you’ve never been good with farewells. The only comfort you have is the promise that one day, you will get to see these people again.


	17. Chapter 17

Your teacher’s hut is located at the edge of his village, surrounded by forest. For most of the day, sunlight would be blocked by the trees, however, during sunrise, that light would make its frontal assault, making it impossible to sleep in.

It brings back memories. He had taught you to hunt for food here- killing animals in the most painless and efficient ways. In the beginning, you had been squeamish, not liking the feeling of flesh giving way under your blade, or the sickening squelch of their muscles and fat being cut. Over time, you got used to it, not giving a second thought when it came to even skinning the carcass. It may have been your imagination but your teacher seemed dismayed at this idea. On your travels, you learned to apply the principles of hunting animals to people. Only terrible people, of course. Those overdosing on drugs, those trafficking innocent people, murderers and thieves. It was easier than the first time you killed an animal. Those people were worse than animals.

There is a break in the dirt road you walk on, and a small building emerges into your line of sight.

“Teacher Sandayu!!” You shout, waving wildly as soon as you arrive at his home

Your teacher waits for you at the front gate. He is clad in traditional garments from his home country of Jappon. His long greying hair reaches to his waist, and he watches you with soft teal eyes. You run to him, beaming, license in hand. You shove the thin piece of metal in front of his face, showing it off.

“I did it!” You boast.

He chuckles, patting your head. The man really is almost like a father to you.

“Well done, (Y/N). How was this years exam?”

“It was alright. I made some great friends.” Your grin turns into a frown. “But there’s actually a lot that I wanted to ask you.”

He sighs, guiding you to the dojo, where you usually train with a hand on the small of your back. Exasperation and a hint of regret- you can feel it in the tension around him.

“Before that I have some questions for you too.”

“Shoot.” You permit, glancing at him.

He pauses, folding his hands in front of him. It’s an awkwardness that you aren’t used to with the man. From experience, it only happens when he brings up a serious topic, and so you prepare for the worst.

“What did you learn from the exam?”

You blink- it’s not as bad as you had expected, so you let out a laugh.

“What is this, an essay question?” You joke, your tone awfully light. “Well, I wouldn’t say I _learnt_ anything new. If anything, I think it just reinforced what I knew before… That there needs to be good people in the world to eliminate the bad.”

“I see.” There’s a hint of disappointment in his voice.

“So, what was the correct answer?” You muse.

“I was just hoping you’d have learnt something more.” He gives a half-hearted chuckle, “No matter.”

“Are there anymore questions, teach’?”

“No. Now, I’m assuming your questions are about Nen?”

You stiffen at the familiar word. The man from trick tower had mentioned it. He’s right, the question is about Nen, and so much more.

“What is Nen exactly?” You probe tersely.

“So you have encountered it. As I thought.” Her purses his lips in thought, stopping at the entrance to the dojo before continuing. “Let us duel.”

“What? But I want to know about Nen! And I have so many things to ask you!” You whine.

Instead of answering, he slips off his footwear, stepping onto the beige flooring of the dojo. He motions for you to follow suite, and you do so reluctantly.

The two of you move to the centre of the room, bowing to each other before the match starts. Immediately, you spring back, studying his motions- he observes you silently, not in any fighting stance. You make the first move, throwing your weight forward with a hand drawn back, reaching for your dagger.

Sandayu doesn’t move to dodge your attack. Instead a spiked, silver sphere flies towards you. The ball is attached to a chain and an iron staff.  You recognise it as a chigiriki, but it seems to have materialised out of nothing. The chains of the weapon rattle as the weight closes in on you. You dodge to the side, however, the ball follows your path. It bends unnaturally, against the centrifugal force which drives a typical flail weapon. You make a sound of surprise, trying your best to redirect your body again. The weight continues to follow you, throwing your next sidestep off balance. There is an instinctive surge of heat in your arms as you cross them in front of you to block the brunt of the damage. With a grunt, you are sent flying backwards, halfway across the room. You wince as the spikes dig into your flesh. The impact has your vision hazy.  

When you snap back to attention, your teacher had vanished from sight. Alerted, you scan your surroundings, only to feel a sharp blade press against your jugular. You throw up your arms at the quick defeat, with a hefty sigh.

“That is Nen, (Y/N).” The feeling of the cold metal disappears, “But I suppose we should start with the basics.”

There is a gentle smile against his lips, as if offering an apology for injuring you. You rub at the shallow wounds on your forearms with a huff.

~

After dressing your wounds, the two of you seat yourselves in a different room. The short table is in the centre of the room, and you sit opposite from Sandayu. There is a paper between you and he begins to write.

He explains to you the four major principles of Nen- Ten, Zetsu, Ren and Hatsu. On each page, there is a figure that resembles a person, with varying amount of aura surrounding them. For Ten, there is a thin layer, masking the users entire body. For Zetsu, no aura surrounds the figure. For Ren, thick explosive aura shrouds the person. For Hatsu, he explains that you are free to choose a personalised technique by applying any form of Nen.

This ‘Nen’ concept seems to explain all your questions- from the man in trick tower, to the heat that engulfs you. It even explains the strange substance that Hisoka had used, perhaps the magic tricks he showed you as a child too. You shiver at the thought of him having learnt Nen so long ago. It seemed like it was his Hatsu ability. Similarly, the control your teacher had over the ball seemed like a Hatsu ability as well.

“And what you used to control the ball was Hatsu?” You ask.

“Yes. In fact, if you had not reacted the way you did, you may have lost the ability to use your arms.” He muses.

“What?” You exclaim, taken aback.

“But I trust my students to defend themselves appropriately.” He ruffles your hair, “Well done. However, don’t be too worried. I would have let my Nen go if you didn’t react accordingly.”

“Hah…” You pause, “So, I’ve already used Ren?”

“Partially, what you used was actually Ko, an advanced technique. You focused the aura onto your arms to protect yourself from my Nen. Your legs weren’t strong enough to take the blow, so you ended up flying backwards.”

You fold your legs to your chest, resting your head on your knees. It’s a lot of information to take in, and a crease forms between your eyebrows. This type of thing should be impossible, yet you had witness such apparent evidence of it. Your heart-rate speeds up, palms sweating with a newfound excitement. 

“You knew from the start that I could use Nen when I came back, right?”

“Yes. Although I have never seen a case like yours before.”

You lift your head. “What do you mean?”

“Not all of your aura nodes have opened. In fact, I can say with compete certainty that you are not yet able to see Nen.”

“Nen is visible?” You blurt out.

“Of course. However, the aura nodes in your eyes haven’t been opened.” He states.

“No wonder…” You contemplate. “So why are some of the nodes still closed? How did the open ones become that way in the first place?”

“A great question. Your guesses may be more accurate than mine, although if I had to guess, it is probably because of your experiences.”

“Why?”

“In your case, you may have focused a great deal of concentration on work to do with your limbs. Something akin to meditation. That would have regulated your flow of aura, giving you more control over it. Moreover, if you’ve spent time around Nen-users, you will get used to the feeling of aura. Perhaps this caused some of your aura nodes to open on their own.” He frowns. “Or you may have been initiated when you first encountered Nen without knowing. Tell me, what happened at the exam?”

You explain the encounter with the man in trick tower, going into detail about the conditions, and weird haziness in your mind throughout the fight. You also tell him about your encounter with Pokkle, how the warmth had taken over your body and had acted without knowing.

“I see… Truly a unique case.”

The words ebb a feeling of contentment in your chest. To be unique. You like the sound of that. It makes you feel strong.

~

In the next two weeks, you meditate to open the aura nodes that had been left closed. It’s unusual to focus such attention on the flow to those areas of your body. Within an hour, your attention would waver, and you would slump to the ground in frustration.

You lay against the soft mat of your teacher’s dojo, the back of your hand against your forehead. You had never imagined meditation to be so tiring. You could feel the heat in your limbs when you concentrate, yet it is another level of difficulty to try to bring the feeling from the core of other areas. Especially your eyes.

“Teacher!” You wail in frustration, “It’s not working.”

“Keep practising. I’m sure you can feel your progress.” He reasons.

“Well sure, but I still can’t see-“

A loud crash from outside interrupts your conversation. It is followed by the sound of smashing glass and numerous footsteps. Five men appear before you, wielding knives which have evidently been stained by blood.

“We’ve found you.” Says a thick male voice.

You immediately jump to your feet, wielding your dagger. They have you surrounded in a flash, but one seems to be out of formation. You charge at him. They’re a lot faster than you would have thought, easily matching your speed. The man you had attacked reads your moves well, blocking and countering with precision. The two of you are evenly matched, yet there are four more of them.

In a flash, the man in front of you collapses, shuriken aimed perfectly at his wrists. The weapon is its own unique colour, a hue you had never seen before, along with an inscription also unfamiliar.

“Momochi Sandayu…” One man gasps.

You recognise the pattern now, from history books you read along your travels. Maybe you should have made the connection earlier, your eyes widen. A great shinobi who was named after his great grandfather- appearing out of nowhere leading a powerful clan.

“Oh? So you’ve heard about me before.”

“You resurrected one of the greatest clans in history! Why are you here?”

“I’m afraid that’s a secret.”

You are just as shocked as the rest of them, watching in awe as he swiftly strikes down the other four Nen users with his bare hands. You can barely track his movements. He makes it seem so easy, when you struggled taking on just one.

At that moment, there is a flicker of light in the corner of your eyes. It grows, and you can see a thin white fog enveloping your teachers body. You let out an acute gasp, stumbling back slightly. The sight is followed by a comfortable heat surging through every inch of your body.

“I-I-“ You are speechless.

“Congratulations, (Y/N). You’ve learnt Nen.” Sandayu grins.

~

After a week of learning to put in practise Ten and Ren, your teacher tells you to continue practising. Your current assignment is to learn to maintain Ren for an entire day, comfortably, and use Ten for half an hour. While the tasks didn’t seem particularly belligerent, there really were. Up until now, maintaining 3 minutes of Ren has you sweating, and at 5 minutes you can barely hold yourself upright. When practising Ten, your concentration would waver, and so would your aura, causing the energy to flow away. You’d have to close your aura nodes soon after. This lead to your decision to travel again, practising the two principles in unfamiliar lands.

You bring a packed duffel bag, slung over your shoulder while you say your final goodbyes to your teacher.

“I still oppose this idea. Practising Ten and Ren with no supervision will be like a beacon.” He sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“You said that the first time I left too.” You shrug. “I think I did pretty well.”

“The first time you left, you came back out of shape since you slacked off on practise.” He berates.

“Only slightly!. Besides, I really want to learn Hatsu. I’ll practise well and when I come back, you better teach me!”

He lets out another sigh. “Alright, alright.”

You open the gate in silence, carefully shutting it behind you after you exist.

“My student, do you know why I left the clan which I resurrected?”

You shake your head in a wordless answer, staring at him inquisitively.

“Good.”

“You’re not gonna tell me?!” You exclaim.

He shakes his head. “You must find the reason on your own.”

“Fine. I’ll find a great answer on my travels.” You decide, before waving back at him. “I’ll see you soon!”

As Sandayu watches you leave, he laughs- a forlorn chuckle laced with bitterness and stained with regret. He shakes his head, trying to rid the emotions.

“No. She is my student. I will trust her to learn well.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAA sorry this took so long I finished exams more than a week ago and have been sleeping and playing games since then. I’ve recently been obsessed with nightshade/hyakka hyakurou (as you can see from the easter eggs I guess in this chapter. Ha ha ‘-‘;;). I was halfway tempted to call the guy Chojiro, and give him a huge ass double sided sword but that would be too similar to nightshade. And it wouldn’t make sense in the hxh universe. Hah.  
> I guess it was a well timed obsession since I intended for your teacher to be from Jappon anyways- so therefore an ex-shinobi or something akin to it.


	18. Chapter 18

You heave a sigh, falling back against the wooden deck of the boat with a thud. The briny air stings at the little crescent shaped cuts on your palm, where you had clenched your fists too tightly. You can’t concentrate. Every half an hour, your attention would falter, observing the mundane waves of water to be more interesting than concentrating on your aura.

Just as you begin to hone your aura again, a loud clatter sounds from behind you. Your back twitches at the intrusive sound. You instinctively whip your head around to the source, ready to fight when your concentration is suddenly directed to the noise.

“Woah there. It’s just me.” The captain lets out a gruff chuckle.

“You startled me.” You state, blatantly.

“Evidently.”

There is a pregnant pause, and you’re about to ignore him to resume your meditation when he begins to speak again.

“Meteor city, huh?”

“Mhm. It’s been a while… I wonder if they miss me.”

He gives a hearty laugh. “Of course they would. You’re probably something of an angel to them.”

“Hum hum~ That’s true, we can’t all choose to be like me.” You joke.

“No tact.” The bearded man scoffs before drawing a breath through his pipe. “I’m just here to let you know that we’ll be docking in 10 minutes.”

“Alright, thanks, capt.” You acknowledge and wave him off.

As you are about to focus on your aura again, you notice that the familiar warmth still cacoons your body. You look down, and sure enough, a thick white film of steam coats your limbs, no tendrils of the strange glow leaking away. You stiffen in shock, which swiftly transforms into excitement. You had subconsciously maintained your Ten throughout the conversation.

“Yes!” You exclaim, pumping a fist into the air.

~

As always, you begin your trip to the poverty-stricken city browsing through endless mountains of trash. The amount of valuables that people dump here never ceases to amaze you, although considering the state of this city, those said valuables have no value to most who stumble across. Occasionally, you would crouch down to run your finger along a glistening jewel, the remains of a gaming console, or carefully crafted décor. Of course, nothing is to be taken from meteor city. You almost learnt that the hard way, the first time you visited the city. That incident also led up to your recruitment to work at the local relief centre in meteor city, your destination for today.

The aid building is a grey structure formed from stone and cement. It’s dilapidated exterior starkly contrasts with the atmosphere of its bustling interior. Contented chatter and vibrant yellow light fills the hall, spilling out of the occasional barred windows which line the walls. Unlikely companions draw together at tables decorated with tacky tablecloths and fake candles. The seats at each table mismatch, an assortment of scruffy armchairs and beat-up stools, all of varying colours and patterns. With the funds it took to run the place out of charity, you are sure that they could have afforded to completely deck out the place, yet the low-budget comfort seems to suit the city so much more than what money can buy.

The sight is welcoming, almost homely, when you open the double doors. It’s obvious from the way you dress that you aren’t from Meteor City, but you smile, greeting those who you pass on the way to the kitchen. Some smile back with cheer, while others stare coldly. Of course, you understand this attitude all too well. There are also familiar faces, children who you tried to teach, rebellious teenagers who you shared stories with, adults who you tried to befriend, you extend a smile to them before disappearing into the back room.

The kitchen tiled a spotless white. It’s equipped with an expensive induction cooktop, countless sets of pots and pans, and probably more sinks than is necessary. There is a severe shortage of what is deemed ‘trustworthy staff’, meaning used dishes pile up in those sinks until late at night, when the doors close. It also means that the menu is reduced to only offering chicken and vegetable soup with bread. Fortunately, no one seems to mind.

You pull your hair up into a plastic netting, and stretch disposable gloves over your fingers. As you tie a white apron around your waist, a familiar flash of pink catches your eye. You beam, at the girl.

“Machi! It’s so great to see you again!” You call, bounding to her side.

“Ah, is that so?” Her voice is full of dismissal as she carries on trimming excess fat off a piece of chicken.

“Yeah. I have so much to tell you! First of all, I passed the hunter exam!“ You briefly note the thin aura around her, barely present, with wisps leaking away from her body, what your teacher had told you are telltale signs of someone who doesn’t know Nen.

“Not really. I can see.” She mutters.

“Huh?”

“No, it’s nothing.” She shrugs.

A faint bubbling noise draws your attention, and you take the lid off a nearby pot when the liquids boil, threatening to spill over the edge. You look inside, the vegetables have been cooked thoroughly and are all mushy. The chicken also seems to be done, and the aroma of exotic spices floods the room.

“That pot should be done.” Machi states, “You can go ahead and serve.

You nod, turning off stove. You bring the heavy pot to the serving window, where a long line had formed. Beside the counter are stacks of bowls, cutlery and trays, ready to be set up. Each tray is topped with a bowl full of soup, a loaf of bread, and a set of knives and forks. Assigning these portions only takes small, swift movements. You slide the plastic trays forward, as each patron takes one.

“Have a great meal!” You send them off with a friendly smile.

You are almost done serving the current pot of soup when the kitchen doors slam open, almost seeming to shake the entire building. You turn to the overbearing presence, and recognise the friendly smile upon the lips of a large, familiar man. Or perhaps more of a bear than a man. His abnormal stature distracts you from the presence of a quiet Ten around his body, which instantly falters at the sight of you.

“If It isn’t (Y/N)!” Booms a powerful voice.

“Uvo!” You grin, trying and failing to evade the grip that is now around your shoulder, and the knuckles grinding into the top of your head in a playful gesture.

You wonder if him being in contact with your Ten would trigger some sort of adverse reaction. Instantly, you let the strong, steady aura, which had encased you, falter.

“It’s been years! We’ll have to catch up tonight!”

“Yeah. I have so much to tell you! Now please try not to strangle me before I can catch up with the rest of your troupe as well.” You pout, trying to wriggle free to serve the last of the soup.

He pulls back with casual laughter. “I’m sure you’ll be fine.”

“No way. That hug was way too overbearing. You almost remind me of this guy who used to show me magic tricks and accidentally cut me with them.” You deadpan.

You carry the pot back to the sink, after handing out the last portions. You run some water into it, so that the remnants of food wouldn’t stick to the pot, making it hard to wash later. You are about to go back for the dirty dishes that were left at the counter, but Uvo had beat you to it. He carries over an anxiety-inducing amount, laying them carefully into another sink.

“Wow, (Y/N). You sure are friends with a lot of freaks.” He guffaws.

“Really?” You frown.

“Yeah, you being friends with us is a testimate to that.”

“No way, if anything, I’m way worse than you guys. I’m the one who essentially wants to go around killing criminals” You scoff.

You pull off the dirty gloves, exchanging them for a new pair. You toss some carrots, lettuce and mushroom into a large bowl, rinsing the vegetables with water.

“Hah! If you knew about our-“

He is cut off by Machi’s elbow to his gut. It’s not that it hurt him, more snapped him back to reality, and who you are. Perhaps the both of them had grown much too fond of an outsider. You tilt your head at the scene.

“Well, enough about us. Tell us about your latest adventure.” His words are enough to perk you away from wanting to probe into what he had intended to share.

“Well actually, I’m a pro hunter now!” You beam, sprinkling salt onto the vegetables in an effort to clean their exterior more thoroughly. “I passed the test like a week ago, and it was pretty… interesting to say the least.” You laugh.

“Really? You get into any satisfying brawls?”

“Well, I did happen to walk into the ‘arena’ themed trick tower. So yea, tonnes.” You answer, recalling the exam with irritation. “I ended up killing a tonne of criminals. And honestly, I feel sorry for a select few of them.”

“There’s a difference? I thought all criminals are the devil in your eyes.” Uvo jokes.

“Of course, their backstory matters!” You argue “Some of them sounded like decent people who walked down the wrong path.”

“That sounds… tough.” His words are hesitant, with a forced light tone.

“It was. Not to mention, there was this boy that I used to have a huge crush on. He appeared literally out of nowhere, threatened me, got me involved with a weirdo who tried to kill me, and then just leaves, claiming I’m in his debt. Seriously!” You rant, taking out your frustrations on the poor vegetables which you are washing all too roughly. “Honestly, did I not read enough romance books when I was younger? I don’t get the memo here.”

Machi raises an eyebrow at Uvo, who seems to be engaged by your story, laughing jovially at your recount of events.

“And also,” You continue, “There was this weird, scary thing where I blanked out. And somehow I ended up nearly stabbing this poor kid half to death.”

“Wow, that’s-“ Machi’s monotone comment is cut off with your ceaseless, incessant rambling.

“And before that I got swallowed by this giant frog, covered with this gross slimy goop, and had to kick it in weird places to get it to move.” You huff, wanting to cover your face at the embarrassing memory.

Machi sighs, barely listening, knowing that she’d hear a repeat of the exact same word vomit later that night. A glance at the clock warrants the time, 6 PM, 3 more hours of listening to you rant, and then she could listen to you rant to more people. Oh, the joy. At least she had stories to keep her entertained through the bland process of cutting chicken and throwing it into a boiling pot.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so with this new update, I want to announce that this story is going on hiatus. (And also sorry for not updating for an entire month—holy-----) Looking back, I realise that this story is the definition of poorly planned-stress relief-make it up as I go- writing, which really doesn’t suit its synopsis. Like I’m satisfied with the first few chapters but after introducing Hisoka, the story just turns into slush. It’s contents are wishy-washy and so are the characters, since in the beginning, I didn’t have any clue where I wanted this story to go or how I wanted to use the characters, etc, etc, etc. 
> 
> Now I’ve figured out an ending for this story, so now I’m going to try to re-write it, knowing what I want to achieve with it- and hopefully it’ll turn out a lot better than what it is now…. Hahahah…. Although I’m not sure if I trust my dedication. ‘-‘;; 
> 
> Either way, thank you all for reading/following this story up until now, and I hope I can stick with the revision. ^^


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